Ari Gold Quotes (Page 2)

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Ari Gold: Listen, Lloyd, I want you to put all my files, folders, binders, *everything* into a box! If you find a used condom, an executioner's mask, and a f**king spike paddle, don't think, just pack that bitch! Chop suey!

  • Rating 5.0 / 5Vote for this Quote! • July 20th, 2007


Ari Gold: I thought you already were his manager. Because believe me I would not put up with this much s**t from anyone who wasn't.
Eric: Yeah, I know I am, but I want to do it for real, you know? I want to have the conversation, lock it in.
Ari Gold: So you come to me for advice. I'm gonna f**king cry. All right, here's what you do. You deal with talent the same way that you deal with women. You have to make them believe that they need you more then you need them.
Eric: He doesn't need me that much.
Ari Gold: Of course he doesn't need you. You're f**king worthless. I could get a million morons to come in here and do the job. That's not the point.
Eric: Then what is the point, Ari?
Ari Gold: The point is that he is an insecure f**k, like all beautiful-but-handed-everything-on-a-silver-platter people. He doesn't trust anyone in this world but you. You've been born into royalty baby. You know it. Now you just gotta be thankful, and wear the crown.

  • Rating 5.0 / 5Vote for this Quote! • July 20th, 2007


Ari Gold: Call me Helen Keller because I'm a f**king miracle worker!

  • Rating 5.0 / 5Vote for this Quote! • July 20th, 2007


Ari: I knew you liked d**k, Babs, but i didn't realize you were a c**ksucker!

  • Rating 4.5 / 5Vote for this Quote! • July 20th, 2007


Ari: It's like high school. You can't f**k the prom queen until she finds out her best friend jerked you off underneath the bleachers!

  • Rating 5.0 / 5Vote for this Quote! • July 20th, 2007



Ari: F**k the phones, Lloyd! Unless Carmen Electra calls for an emergency titty-f**k, don’t answer!

  • Rating 5.0 / 5Vote for this Quote! • July 20th, 2007


Ari: There you go, baby -- Men at Work, the land down under...We're gonna get drunk with Russell Crowe, and we're gonna headbutt some goddamn kangaroos.

  • Rating 5.0 / 5Vote for this Quote! • July 20th, 2007


Mrs. Gold: uh huh...and what's in the gym bag?
Ari: A kilo of blow. [Ari laughs nervously] What's with all the f**king questions?
Mrs. Gold: [to Eric] He's showing off for you.

  • Vote for this Quote! • July 20th, 2007


Ari: You like Gaysian Lloyd? He's cute, right? And he covers two quotas.

  • Rating 5.0 / 5Vote for this Quote! • July 20th, 2007


Ari: [to Eric] I would say hug it out, but I don't want you drawing wood.

  • Rating 5.0 / 5Vote for this Quote! • July 20th, 2007


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Total Quotes: 41