Barney Stinson Quotes (Page 7)
Barney: Believe it or not, I was not always as awesome as I am today.
• Rating 5.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • March 29th, 2007Barney: [making a fake phone call] Hi, leg warehouse? Yeah, my friend Ted needs something to stand on. [pause] So, nothing for him to stand on? Ok, thanks so much. [hangs up phone]
• Rating 5.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • March 29th, 2007 Robin: What the hell are you doing?
Barney: I'm birthday suiting up!
Barney: The only reason to wait a month for sex is if she's 17 years, 11 months old.
• Rating 5.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • March 29th, 2007 Robin: Well, it looks like it's gonna be just you and me.
Barney: Really!?
Robin: Actually, I was talking to my Martini.
Robin: No. I thought we're just hanging out as friends.
Barney: Oh, come on. You've been throwing yourself at me all night.
Robin: What? I did the opposite, I threw some other girl at you.
Barney: You invited me up to your apartment to play Battleship. Is that not an internationally recognized term for sex?
Barney: Ted, oh my gosh, I love this moment. You know why? Because I'm going to say it and this time you're actually going to say 'yes'. You're ready? Ready to say 'yes' Ted? Suit up!
Ted: Yes! [about to leave but then steps back] No.
Barney: That's right, I just got paid for sex! [smiles at 50 dollars] Maybe I should give this money to the Peace Corps. They've done so much for me tonight.
• Rating 5.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • March 28th, 2007Barney: Sorry, buddy, wish I could help you, but my hands are tied. Oh, no, wait. That was last night. [makes a whipping sound]
• Rating 5.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • March 28th, 2007 Barney: [flips open his cell] This better be good, I'm about to enter Nirvana... by the way, I should give you Nirvana's phone number, she gives a great massage--say whaaat?
Massagist: Barney! [slaps him with her foot]
Barney: Ow! I know the house rules: es un chiste!