Bart Simpson Quotes (Page 12)
(Bart and Lisa stare at Homer, who just ate the disgusting sandwich)
Bart: Oh great, Dad's dead.
Homer: Are we gonna die, son?
Bart: Yeah, but at least we're going to take a lot of innocent people with us.
Bart: Y'know? I used to think you were stuck in an emasculating, go-nowhere job.
Homer: Heh, heh… Kids.
Bart: But now, I want to follow in your footsteps.
Homer: [excited] Do you want to change your name to Homer Junior? The kids can call you Ho-Ju!
Bart: [appropriate pause] I'll get back to you.
Bart: Nothing you say can upset us. We're the MTV generation.
Lisa: We feel neither highs or lows.
Homer: Really? What's it like?
Lisa: Meh. [shrugs].
[The family tries to get Maggie to talk.]
Marge: Maggie, can you say "Mama?" Can you say "Baba?"
Bart: Can you say "Get bent?"
Marge: Bart!
Bart: Mr. Rogers says it all the time!
Marge: He does not!
Bart: [calling Moe's Tavern] I'm looking for Amanda, last name Huggenkiss?
Moe: Yeah, just a sec. I'll check. [calling out to the patrons] Amanda Hugginkiss? Hey, I'm lookin' for Amanda Hugginkiss. Why can't I find Amanda Hugginkiss?
[The patrons laugh.]
Barney: Maybe your standards are too high!
Moe: [to phone] You little S.O.B. Why, when I find out who you are, I'm going to shove a sausage down your throat and stick starving dogs in your butt!
Bart: My name is Jimbo Jones and I live on 742 Evergreen Terrace.
Moe: Ha! Big mistake, pal!
Mrs. Krabappel: Bart, have you ever read The Boy Who Cried Wolf?
Bart: I'm halfway through it, I swear!
[Bart and Lisa run into the living room.]
Lisa: Dad! We did something very bad!
Homer: Did you wreck the car?
Bart: No.
Homer: Did you raise the dead?
Lisa: Yes!
Homer: But the car's okay?
Bart and Lisa: Uh-huh.
Homer: Okay, then!
Homer: What's the big deal about going to some building every Sunday? I mean, isn't God everywhere?
Bart: Amen, brother!
Homer: And don't you think the almighty has better things to do than wonder where one guy spends one measly hour of his week?
Bart: Tell it, daddy!
Homer: And what if we've picked the wrong religion? Every week we're just making God madder and madder!
Bart: [claps, waves arms] Testify!
Bart Simpson: [Playing with the flying mechanism after the show] Hey, look at me - I'm Blanche DuBois!
• Vote for this Quote! • July 16th, 2007