Bart Simpson Quotes (Page 17)
Homer: About last night. You might have noticed Daddy acting a little strange and you probably don't understand why.
Bart: I understand why. You were wasted.
Homer: I admit it. I didn't know when to say "when." I'm sorry it happened and I just hope you didn't lose a lot of respect for me.
Bart: Dad, I have as much respect for you as I ever did or ever will.
[After Bart has lost the election]
Bart: I demand a recount!
Ms. Krabappel: [counts the votes gleefully] One for Martin. Two for Martin. Would you like another recount?
Bart: [Beaten] No.
Ms. K: [Rubbing it in] Well, I just want to make sure. One for Martin. Two for Martin. [chuckles]
[Bart is watching "How kittens are born: The UGLY story."]
Bart: Oh look, this is really cool. When I hit reverse, I can make them go back in!
Bart: Now... Sit! I said, Sit! Um, take a walk. Sniff that other dog's butt. See? He does exactly what I tell him.
• Vote for this Quote! • July 11th, 2007 Bart: No way, she's faking! If Lisa stays home, I stay home.
Lisa: If Bart stays home, I'm going to school.
Bart: Fine, then... Wait a minute... If Lisa goes to school, then I go to school, but then Lisa stays home, so I stay home, so Lisa goes to school...
Marge: Lisa, don't confuse your brother like that.
Skinner: Bart, I'm flabbergasted. Surely you realized that by writing your name in forty-foot letters on the athletic field that you would be caught!
Bart: Maybe it was one of the other Barts, sir.
Skinner: THERE ARE NO OTHER BARTS!
Bart: Uh-oh.
Lisa: But Mom, if you take our cartoons away, we'll grow up without a sense of humor and be robots!
Bart: Really? What kind of robots?
Homer: Bart! Stop fighting with your sister!
Bart: She took my glue!
Lisa: It's not yours, Bart. This is family glue!
Homer: Stop it, you two. This is Thanksgiving, so glue friendly or I'll take your glue away and then no one will have any glue to glue with.
Lisa: Dad, this isn't about glue. It's about territoriality. He only wants the glue because I'm using it.
Bart: Oh yeah? Prove it.
Lisa: [hands him the glue] Here.
Bart: Hey man, I don't want your stupid glue.
Bart: All right! Twelve big ones and free grub to boot. Viva Skid Row!
• Vote for this Quote! • July 11th, 2007 Bart: Twelve bucks! Hey, I can bleed!
Nurse: Hey, you've gotta be eighteen to sell your blood. Let's see some ID.
Bart: Here ya go, doll face.
Nurse: Ok, Homer, just relax.
Bart: Ow!