Bart Simpson Quotes (Page 8)
Larry: I'm looking for this guy; anybody know him?
Bart: Sure, we know him. That's Mr. Burns.
Lisa: He tried to kill our puppies!
Marge: He sexually harassed me!
Grandpa: He stole my fiancée!
Homer: He made fun of my weight!
[Long pause. Then...]
Larry: Okay, so there's been some friction. Know his address?
Bart: What religion are you?
Homer: Oh, you know, the one with all those well-meaning rules that don't work in real life... Christianity.
Bart: What the hell is this? (watching "Amendment to Be")
Lisa: It's one of those campy '70s throwbacks that appeals to Generation X'ers.
Bart: We need another Vietnam to thin out their ranks a little!
Bart: Lisa, if I ever stop loving violence, I want you to shoot me.
Lisa: Can do!
Bart: Krusty's tired of having phonies pretending to be his friend. I'm sure he'll find plenty of people who'll like him for who he is.
Krusty: Uh... it could happen! Huh, who needs friends? All I need is the incessant beep of the global positioning system.
Bart: Heh-heh, locusts. they'll drive him nuts.
Homer: It's all in the bible son, the "prankster's bible" [shows Bart his very small holy bible]
Lisa: I think it's ironic that dad saved the day while a slimmer man would have fallen to his doom.
Bart: And I think it's ironic that for once dad's butt prevented the release of toxic gas-
Marge: Bart!
Homer: Bart and Lisa have to go to school while I get to stay home, na na na na na!
Lisa: I like school!
Homer: Well, why don't you live in it then?
Lisa: I would if I could!
Bart: Not me sister, when I grow up I'm gonna be a lardo on workman's comp just like Dad.
Lisa: (reading): Come to Homer's BBBQ - The extra B is for BYOBB.
Bart: What's THAT extra B for?
Homer: That's a typo
Bart: You bought my soul back?
Lisa: With the spare change in my piggy bank.
Bart: You don't have any spare change in your piggy bank.
Lisa: Not in any of the ones you know about.