Brian Quotes (Page 10)
Brian Griffin: Thank you for coming, Deep Throat.
Kermit the Frog: [hiding] You'll understand if I don't come out from the shadows, my identity will be safest if you never see my face.
Brian Griffin: Uh... okay.
Kermit the Frog: Mayor West hasn't slept at home for three nights!
Brian Griffin: Kermit the Frog?
Kermit the Frog: [gasps, flees] Somebody talked! No one is safe! I'm getting out of here!
Stewie Griffin: What's his appeal, anyway!
Brian Griffin: I spent all morning watching a VH1 special on Gwen Stefani. I don't know what a "Hollaback Girl" is... all I know is I want her dead.
• Vote for this Quote! • July 18th, 2007 Peter Griffin: I mean, you wouldn't have sex with Lois would ya?
Brian Griffin: Oh yeah, I would.
Peter Griffin: Really?
Brian Griffin: Oh yeah. Oh yeah. I would do everything to her, I don't care what she looks like. I would wreck that chick.
Peter Griffin: Well, you are a trooper.
Lois Griffin: Okay, one more minute, and then if there are two pink lines...
Peter Griffin: Oh, God, I hope you're not pregnant. We can't afford another kid. We already got Chris, Stewie, Richie, Joanie, Greg, Marcia, Bobby, Jan, Mike Seaver, Carol Seaver, Boner, Urkel, Mr. Furley...
Brian Griffin: Peter, those aren't your kids. That's the Nick at Nite lineup.
Peter Griffin: ...Blanka, Zangief, Chun-Li, Guile, E. Honda...
Brian Griffin: That's Street Fighter.
Peter Griffin: ... red, blue, green...
Brian Griffin: Those are colors.
Lois Griffin [with noticeably bigger breasts]: Oh, Brian, my breasts are so sore, and they've gotten so engorged from the weaning, I've gone up two bra sizes.
Brian Griffin: Wha... what did you do with the old bras?
Stewie Griffin: That's more disgusting than when Peter went through his Daisy Dukes phase.
[cut to Peter wearing extremely short cut-off jeans]
Peter Griffin: So who's up for some hoops at the park, huh? Oh, there you are, come here, you basketball... [he bends over to pick it up, exposing his butt to Stewie and Brian]
Brian Griffin: It's like a walrus flossing!
Lois Griffin: Oww, damn... that hurts.
Brian Griffin: What happened?
Lois Griffin: I was breast feeding Stewie and he bit me again. I think he might have even broken the skin.
Brian Griffin: I see. Uhm... maybe I should, uh, you know, uh, look at it. Uh... I, uh, I, I have seen a lot of medical shows.
Lois Griffin: You see, the areola is very tender here, and I think one of his new teeth may have bitten down right on the duct.
Brian Griffin: [stares at her breasts] I'm sorry, what?
Lois Griffin: I don't know what to do Brian. Breast feeding is just so painful since Stewie's teeth are coming in. Now I know how Alec Baldwin feels when he feeds his brothers.
[cut to Alec Baldwin breast-feeding his brothers]
Alec Baldwin: There you go, there you go. Eat up, Stephen, you're the weakest.
Lois Griffin: Oh, sweetie, you look so handsome on TV!
Brian Griffin: I can't believe you actually won! But I suppose it's not the strangest thing I've seen on a game show... like when Adam West was on Jeopardy!
[cut to Jeopardy!]
Alex Trebek: All right, players, the answer once again is, "It was the first spacecraft to land on the surface of Mars." Adam, what was your response... "Kebert Xela." [Trebek mysteriously vanishes]
Mayor Adam West: Only saying his name backwards can send him back to the fifth dimension where he belongs.
Stewie Griffin: Yeah, you got money to pay for fake mustaches, huh? Yeah, yeah... how much you pay for that fake mustache?
Brian Griffin: $2.99.
Stewie Griffin: Mmmm...that's good OJ. [throws the cup at Brian, who moans in pain with glass thrust into him, bleeding] That hurt? That hurt?
Brian Griffin: WHAT THE HELL!?
Stewie Griffin: Yeah, doesn't feel so good, does it? No, huh?Yeah! That's what happens, man!
Brian Griffin: OH MY GOD!
Stewie Griffin: [kicks Brian, then punches him several times] Yeah, that's what happens. Where's my money? You gonna give me my money? Where's my money, man?!
