Carla Espinosa Quotes (Page 2)
Carla: Hey Bambi, you know Mr. Simon made one of the night nurses cry?
J.D.: Which one?
Carla: Frank.
J.D.: Frank used to be a Navy SEAL.
Elliot: Listen, Carla, I can't even pretend that I can give you tips on intercourse....
Carla: I got one for you: stop calling it that.
Elliot: My therapist thinks my trouble in bed stems from a basic fear of intimacy. But I just think it's just because any type of repetitive motion makes me nauseous. Oh, and since I was a little kid, I've always had nightmares about being crushed.
Carla: That poor shrink.
Elliot: What's wrong?
Carla: It's personal.
Elliot: Why won't you ever open up to me? I came to you when I thought I had a broken tailbone and it was just a really bad pimple!
Carla: It's a sex thing, okay?
Elliot: You mean like a gender issue or like intercourse? Because I'm book-smart on both!
Turk: I love you.
Carla: Mmm. Now say it in Spanish.
Turk: Te amo.
Carla: Now...say it like Astro.
Turk: I ruv roo.
J.D.: Have you seen Turk?
Carla: Not since this morning.
J.D.: Well, I'm sure you'll end up seeing him before I do, so...
Carla: Bambi? Are you giving me attitude?
J.D.: What if I am?
Carla: Sweetie, you have to be a minority sidekick in a bad movie to pull that off. You know what I'm talking about, right?
Laverne: Oh, child, please! You speak the truth!
Carla: Explain it to this man, please.
Laverne: First, you do the head, then you do the finger, then you talk through the nose... And then you give a lot of attitude. That's how it works. But if you're not from there, you don't understand, so I'm not gonna even 'axe' you-
J.D.: Okay, I'm gonna leave now.
Carla: What? Oh, no you didn't! Where' you goin'? Where' you goin'!?
Turk: I'm telling ya, Kelso didn't even ask, and she gave you full credit.
Carla: I don't care. Too little, too late. Plus, I know why you're really here. So, I'm gonna park myself right here in the "V.I.P. section," so you can give me what'cha got.
Turk: I was gonna tell you how I busted J.D.'s chops the other day for wanting to be friends with a girl. And now I find it so amazing to see how strong you are, how well you carry yourself, how I'd give anything just to wake up in the morning and watch you read the paper. But instead, I think you should hop off your broom for a second, try and remember what it was like when you first started here, and give Elliot a break. Because she may be a chore, but she is a good person... And your ass looks especially fine today. [starts to walk away]
Carla: Pick me up tomorrow at seven.
Turk: She's not the only one that can do a speech. I can do a speech.
Turk: Oh, come on, Carla, give me one good reason why you won't go out with me.
Carla: Well, you're a surgeon. So, you've got the god-complex, the c**kiness, the whole "married to the job" thing. You're cute, but you're very, very aware of it. You have no idea what I'm like, so all of your feelings for me are coming from down there [points at his crotch]. But most of all, I'm looking for the real thing; and you're nothing but a little boy who's not used to being told "no." So there's a bunch of reasons. Pick your favorite.
J.D.: I'd go with the "god-complex"...but it's hard to choose, you know, they're all so good.
Elliot: I just hate it. I hate the "darlins" I hate the "sweethearts" ...
Carla: You don't need to tell me how hard it is being a woman around here.
Elliot: Well, you're certainly furthering the cause by wearing a thong to work and hooking up in the on-call room. Word gets around.
Carla: You talk like that, do you even know my name? I spend every second of my life either here, or taking care of my mom. So, yeah, maybe I needed a little closeness. I'm sure you never had a quickie at the club, right? Or snuck some skinny, flat-butted college boy up to your sorority room. And my thong? I happen to think it makes my ass look good. And some days, I need to feel good about something around here. And you judge me? Well, guess what, word does get around, Miss "Out For Herself", so you can dump on everyone here if you want; but you will not hurt me.
J.D.: Her name's Carla, by the way.
Turk: This morning, I had my hands inside of a guy's chest. I couldn't even see them! I should not be allowed to do stuff like that. Whazzup.
J.D.: And you weren't scared?
Turk: One way or another, everyone stops bleeding. That is so deep.
Carla: No it isn't.
Turk: It's a little deep.
