Chris Griffin Quotes (Page 3)
Peter Griffin: Since we're all gonna die, There is one more secret I feel I have to share with you, I did not care for The Godfather.
Lois Griffin: What?
Peter Griffin: Did not care for The Godfather
Chris Griffin: How can you even say that, Dad?
Peter Griffin: Didn't like... didn't like it.
Lois Griffin: Peter, it's so good, i-it's like a perfect movie!
Peter Griffin: I — this is what everyone always says... Everyone says "Oh,"—
Chris Griffin: Robert De Niro, Al Pacino... I mean, you never see — ROBERT DUVALL!
Peter Griffin: I know, I li—no—fine, fine actor, did not like the movie.
Brian Griffin: Why not?
Peter Griffin: Did not — couldn't get into it.
Peter Griffin: Good night, buddy. Hey, what's the matter?
Chris Griffin: Oh, I'm scared of the storm, Dad.
Peter Griffin: Well, you know, I think the storm's moving away from us, Chris. You know how I can tell? Here's a little trick. When you see the lightning, you count all the terrible things that can happen to a child, until you hear the thunder. And if you count higher each time, you know the storn's moving away from you. Okay, ready?
Chris Griffin: Ready. [lightning flashes]
Peter Griffin: Okay. Drowning, getting shot in a drive-by...
Chris Griffin: Lyme Disease from a deer tick...
Peter Griffin: Good, good, getting stabbed in the face...
Chris Griffin: Getting shot in the face...
Peter Griffin: Shot in the face, there you go. I see you're kinda stealing mine, but, uh, it's okay. Leukemia...
Chris Griffin: Having a mosquito bite you on your scab... [thunder crashes]
Peter Griffin: Oh, there's the thunder. Okay, let's try again.
Brian Griffin: My petition! What the hell are you doing?
Chris Griffin: I'm going to get to touch right-wing boob because of this!
Chris Griffin: But Brian, the bible says gay marriage is an abomination.
Brian Griffin: Oh, don't give me that Young Republican crap, Chris. The bible also says a senior citizen built an ark and rounded up two of every animal.
Bill Clinton: [naked, singing] Oh this is one fine day to be nude,
Yeah this is one fine day to be nude.
The birds are singing, "Clinton, have a wonderful spring",
And people walking by can stop and look at my thing.
Oh this is one fine day to -
Chris Griffin: Liberal chubby chaser! [throws egg at him]
Bill Clinton: [laughs] Well, if you can't laugh at yourself...
Chris Griffin: She's so pretty that if your Hacky Sack were my private parts, I'd let her do that to them.
Classmate: What? Kick them around?
Chris Griffin: Um, wait... yes.
Peter Griffin: I've steered our family through bigger problems, like when we were cartoon sketches on The Tracey Ullman Show.
[cutaway to a crude, Simpsons-like rendering of the Griffins in the front lawn, standing by a tombstone]
Lois Griffin: Well, that's the end of Puss. He was the best cat anyone ever had.
Peter Griffin: Say, Lois, whaddya say we go downtown and buy a dog?
Brian Griffin: Hey, wait a minute, you already have a dog!
Chris Griffin: So long, Puss.
Meg Griffin: We'll miss you.
Stewie Griffin: It's gonna be quite a different place with him gone, that's for true.
Chris Griffin: Hey, doc, what did you do with my mom's fat?
Dr. Hartman: Well, we stored it all in this storage room. [opens up a closet to show Peter with his pants off kissing a bag of fat]
Peter Griffin: Uhhhh, it's exactly what it looks like.
Chris Griffin: I love you, Grandpa. Your toenails are the same color as my school-bus.
• Rating 5.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • July 18th, 2007 [Peter shoots at the ceiling of the living room. Part of it falls down; Chris falls through it and onto the floor]
Chris Griffin: Hi, Dad!
Peter Griffin: Go to your room.
Chris Griffin: Okay!
[runs upstairs, falls through to the floor again]
