Chris Griffin Quotes (Page 5)
Brian Griffin: Hey, uh, you two better settle down. Chris, give Meg her hat.
Chris Griffin: I don't have to listen to you! You're a dog! You don't have a soul.
Brian Griffin: Ow.
Stewie Griffin: Don't take that! Raise your voice to them.
Brian Griffin: HEY! Knock it off!
TV Announcer: And now, back to Two and a Half Men.
[the screen shows two men and another man with his legs cut off, all three screaming and moving around in pain]
Half Man: Kill me! Please!
Meg Griffin: Turn it, Chris! I want to watch George Lopez.
Chris Griffin: That show only furthers the stereotype that George López is funny.
Chris Griffin: What good is mining nose gold if I can't share it with the townspeople?!
• Vote for this Quote! • July 10th, 2007 Lois Griffin: Now I don't want to hear another word about this.
Peter Griffin: [in sign language] She won't have to hear another word, because we've mastered American sign language!
Chris Griffin: [in sign language] Ha ha ha!
Chris Griffin: Dad, can you help me with my Math? Mr Shackleford says if I don't learn it, I won't be able to function in the real world.
[cut to Chris asking a man for directions]
Man: Okay, now what you gotta do is go down the road past the old Johnson place, then you're gonna find two roads; one parallel and one perpendicular. Now keep going until you come to a highway that bisects it at a 45-degree angle. Solve for X.
[cut to Chris in fetal position sucking his thumb]
Peter Griffin: Math! Math, my dear boy, is but the lesbian sister of Biology.
Chris Griffin: I want a new hat!
Meg Griffin: I want a new hat!
Stewie Griffin: I want them to have new hats!
[Peter and Lois are nude]
Meg Griffin: Oh my God, what are you going?!
Lois Griffin: We were wrong, Meg. If you like Jeff, we should give him a chance.
Peter Griffin: Yeah, and we wanted him to feel welcome in our home.
Chris Griffin: [walks in naked] Mom, I need new batteries for my Walkman. Hey, why is everybody else naked?
Chris Griffin: BOOBIES!
Lois Griffin: Chris, that's enough! Well, I'm sure glad to be out of there!
Peter Griffin: You said it, Lois. What those people are doing just ain't natural.
Chris Griffin: BOOBIES!
Lois Griffin: Did you hear me, young man?
Meg Griffin: I don't know what the big deal was. I thought they were nice.
Chris Griffin: BOOBIES!
Dr. Goodman: Oh, it's a very rare species, the endangered White-Rump Swallow.
Chris Griffin: [laughs] Rump.
Peter Griffin: This isn't funny Chris!
Chris Griffin: Merry Christmas, Dude. Don't put that [candy cane] up your nose. It burns like hell.
• Vote for this Quote! • July 9th, 2007
