Cosmo Kramer Quotes (Page 9)
Elaine: I want to be in on this, too.
Jerry & George: Oh, no. No, no.
Elaine: Why not?
Jerry: It's like apples and oranges.
Elaine: What? Why? Why?
Jerry: Because you're a woman!
Elaine: So what?
Jerry: It's easier for a woman not to do it than a man. Men have to do it. It's part of our lifestyle. It's like, uh, shaving.
Elaine: Oh, that is such boloney. I shave my legs.
Kramer: Not every day.
Kramer: Wait a second, wait a second. Count me in on this.
Jerry: You?
Kramer: Yeah.
Jerry: You'll be out before we get the check.
George: Well, I'll tell you this, though - I am never doing that again.
Elaine: What, you mean, in your mother's house, or all together?
George: Altogether.
Elaine: Oh, gimme a break..
Jerry: Ohhh yeah. Right.
Kramer: Oh, like you're gonna stop.
George: So, one thing led to another…
Jerry: So, what did she do?
George: First she screams, "George, what are you doing?! My God!" And it looked like she was gonna faint - she started clutching the wall, trying to hang onto it.
Kramer: Man!
Elaine: You mean..?!
George: Uh-huh.
Kramer: She caught you?
Jerry: Where?
George: I stopped by the house to drop the car off, and I went inside for a few minutes. Nobody was there. They're supposed to be working. My mother had a Glamour magazine; I started leafing through it ...
Jerry: Glamour?
Kramer: Do you mind if I smoke?
Naomi: No.
Kramer: These are Cubans... "Maria, poquendo los scientos de estes con gleam!"
Kramer: Alright, how often do we do it?
Elaine: Kramer, how is that important? Honestly, do you really think he's gonna ask you that?
Kramer: Elaine, he's a psychiatrist. They're interested in stuff like that.
Elaine: Alright, alright. We do it, uh... five times a week, okay?
Kramer: Oooh, baby.
Elaine: Okay, so he just wants to talk to you. I couldn't talk him out of it. So you just tell him that you're my boyfriend and that we're in love, okay. Can you do that?
Kramer: Yeah, yeah, okay. I'm your boyfriend.
Elaine: Okay.
Kramer: Have we been intimate?
Elaine: Yeah. Yeah, we've been intimate.
Kramer: Yo-yo Ma!
• Vote for this Quote! • June 27th, 2007 Kramer: No. We had a deal. There are no guarantees in life.
Newman: No, but there's karma, Kramer.
Jerry: "Karma Kramer"?
