Dwight Schrute Quotes (Page 13)
Pam: Sometimes the gift is really about the gesture, you know, like, what it means, instead of what it is.
Dwight: You mean ... like a ham?
Pam: No. Not like a ham.
Dwight: Michael wants us to bond, so we need topics for conversation.
Jim: Ponies!
Dwight: No.
Ryan: How about rainbows?
Dwight: No.
Jim: Flowers?
Ryan: Makeup?
Dwight: It's a terrible idea.
Jim: What is?
Dwight: Them in there all together. They stay in there too long, they're gonna get on the same cycle. Wreak havoc on our plumbing.
Dwight: Otherwise it's just malfeasance for malfeasance's sake.
• Rating 5.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • June 26th, 2007 Michael: They say a cluttered desk means a cluttered mind. I say an empty desk means an...
Dwight: Empty mind.
Michael: I was not going to say that.
[Oscar is seen driving into his driveway with his boyfriend]
Dwight: Guess what I found out about Oscar tonight? He was lying about being sick!
Michael: Dwight, put the bottle down or you're fired!
Dwight: You can't fire me! I don't work in this van!
Michael: Dwight, what's your middle name?
Dwight: [Looking dazed] Danger.
Michael: Something with a 'K'.
Jim: It's Kurt. Wow, I'm so sad I know that.
Dwight: I was the youngest pilot in Pan Am history. When I was four, the pilot let me ride in the c**kpit and fly the plane with him. And I was four, and I was great and I would have landed it, but my dad wanted us to go back to our seats.
• Rating 5.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • June 26th, 2007 Angela: Hey, come inside and talk to me.
Dwight: I can't! Do you want us to run aground woman!?
