Earl Hickey Quotes (Page 3)
Scott: I'm proving my love to you.
Tess: By burning a swastika in my yard?
Earl: Dammit.
Black Guy: We're not moving!
Randy: "Try callin' Karma."
Earl: "It's Karma, Randy. Not Lassie!"
Earl: [narrating] Sometimes Randy takes a long road to a simple thought.
Randy: You see, men think different than women. You and I think different than Natalie and Catalina 'cause we're men and they're women. I'm right, right? I'm not wrong. Am I wrong?
Dirk: Hey Earl, is there a condom machine around here?
Earl: No, Dirk!
Dirk: Hey, what are these?
Catilina: Shower caps.
Dirk: That could work!
Randy: You sure you want to get Grandpa's cuckoo clock back? That thing nearly put my eye out.
Earl: Well, you shouldn't have stood so close. You knew what time it was.
Earl: Have you ever heard the saying "Crazy Eyes" ? Well, Donny had them.
• Vote for this Quote! • July 27th, 2007Earl: Ain't no use running, fool! I know where your momma parks her house!
• Vote for this Quote! • July 27th, 2007 Randy: Number 23. Peed in the back of a cop car.
Earl: I'm no longer proud of that.
Earl: (narrating) Next morning I was recuperating from being a little....over served... (Joy walks in to bathroom, removes her towel and reveals her pregnant stomach)
Joy: Morning, honey.
Earl: (narrating) Hell, when I was drinking I thought she just had a bit of a belly, some people might think getting so drunk and accidentally marry a woman that's six months pregnant is a good reason to stop drinking... personally I think it's a good reason to KEEP drinking.
Earl: Do good things and good things happen to you. Do bad things, they'll come back to haunt you.
Randy: That's deep Earl, so why don't you stop hoggin' those vicodins they gave you and we can all chat about that for awhile?
Earl: I’m talking bout karma.
Randy: Who's karma?
Earl: I don't know, just something Carson Daly came up with.
Catalina: Who is this Carson Daly. Some sort of spiritual leader? A holy man?
Randy: You mean you've never watched TRL? You need to turn on a television when you're scrubbing the toilets.