Eric Cartman Quotes (Page 19)
Cartman: I'm gonna be Jesus!
Kyle: You're too fat to be Jesus!
Cartman: Oh, and like you're gonna do it, Jew?!
Kyle: Stan should be Jesus.
Cartman: Either I'm Jesus, or else, screw you guys, I'm going home!
Kyle: You're such a fat baby!
Cartman: Well, I guess you guys can do the Stations of the Cross by yourselves.
Kyle: All right, all right, you could be Jesus, you tubby cry-baby!
Cartman: Stick and stones may break my bones, but I'm Jesus and you aren't.
Cartman: [on the cross] You guys are in big trouble, now get me down from nyah!
• Vote for this Quote! • August 31st, 2007 Worker: Oh my god! Get this child some food quick!
Cartman: [lifts his head up] Chicken wings…
Worker: Chicken wings!
Cartman: [lifts his head again] Medium spicy…
Cartman: [Lodged in the cow's anus] Aw, it smells like Kenny's house in here.
• Vote for this Quote! • August 30th, 2007 Stan: Great job, Cartman, you killed Kyle!
Kenny: [muffled] You bastard!
Cartman: Well he shouldn't have called me fat!
Stan: Why the hell not? That's like calling the sky blue!
Cartman: You can always go on welfare. Just look at Kenny's family, they're perfectly happy being poor and on welfare. Right, Kenny?
Kenny: [Mumbling] F**k you.
Cartman: Hehe...you suck, Kenny.
Underpants Gnomes: Shut up, p***y!
Cartman: I'm not a p***y, you're a p***y, p***y.
Kyle: Wow! Elton John's house is bigger than Cartman's ass!!!
Cartman: No it isn't you guys.
Stan: Yeah Cartman, you suck! If you want to play Americans vs. Bosnians anymore, you can just play with yourself!
Cartman: That's fine! I like playing with myself! I'll play with myself all day long!
[Kenny laughs.]
Cartman: What?!
Cartman: I've learned something, too: selling out is sweet because when you sell out, you get to make a lot of money, and when you have money, you don't have to hang out with a bunch of poor ass losers like you guys.
• Rating 5.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • August 30th, 2007