Eric Cartman Quotes (Page 21)
Cartman: My grandma's Dutch-Irish and my grandpa's lesbian, that makes me quarter lesbian!
• Vote for this Quote! • August 29th, 2007 [Cartman takes a bite out of a cardboard box]
Cartman: My mom said to be a lesbian you have to chow down on this box.
Cartman: My mom told me to be a lesbian you have to lick carpet.
• Rating 5.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • August 29th, 2007Cartman: Oh really? Gosh, where could I have put Pip's invitation? Let's see… Pip's invitation… Pip's invitation… oh, I remember! I shoved it up my ass! Yes. That's right, I wrote it out, put it in an envelope, sealed it, and woop shoved it right up my ass. Forever ruining any chance you had of coming to my party. Sorry, Pip 'ol chap!
• Vote for this Quote! • August 29th, 2007 Stan: If my mom could cook like Cartman's mom I'd be a big fat ass too!
Cartman: That's right!
Cartman: Mr. Garrison, why do poor people smell like sour milk?
Mr. Garrison: I don't know, Eric, they just do.
Cartman: I am an American citizen! Give me food! I am an American citizen!
• Vote for this Quote! • August 29th, 2007Cartman: No, Starvin' Marvin, that's Kenny's cream corn! No Starvin' Marvin! That's a bad Starvin' Marvin!
• Vote for this Quote! • August 29th, 2007Cartman: [day-dreaming while watching a movie, imagining himself to be Adolf Hitler] [German-like accent] You gotta respect my authoritah!
• Rating 4.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • August 29th, 2007 Cartman: Too bad drinking scotch isn't a paying job, otherwise Kenny's dad would be a millionaire.
Kenny: [silence]
Cartman: I said, it's too bad drinking scotch isn't a paying job, or else Kenny's dad would be a millionaire!
Kenny: [silence]
Cartman: Your family is poor, Kenny, your family is poor!