George Costanza Quotes (Page 7)
George: Want to get some lunch.
Jerry: Just had a big bowl of Kix.
George: Oh, well, that's very mature.
George: [doing the opposite] Hi, my name is George. I'm unemployed and I live with my parents.
Veronica: [smiles] I'm Veronica, hi!
Jerry: Geez, these are delicious. Where did you learn to make eggs like this?
Rachel: Umm... This is so good.
George: Ah, enjoying them?
Rachel: Mmm-hmm.
George: Oh, good. You know, you might wanna try eating it with one of these. [Holds up lobster bib]
Rachel: There's lobster in these eggs?
George: Not that much. You know, they tend to shrink in the water.
George: See, look at this. Rachel, my T-shirt shrunk. It used to be much bigger, and now it shrunk. You see, that's what water does. It shrinks things.
Elaine: Really? Tell us more, Mr. Science.
George: Elaine! Do women know about shrinkage?
Elaine: You mean like laundry?
Jerry: Like when a man goes swimming... afterwards...
Elaine: It shrinks?!
Jerry: Like a frightened turtle.
Elaine: Why does it shrink?
George: It just does.
Elaine: I don't know how you guys walk around with those things.
Jerry: Oh, she's not gonna tell Jane.
George: How do you know?
Jerry: Women aren't like us.
George: They're worse! They're much worse than us, they talk about everything!
George: Well I just got back from swimming in the pool. And the water was cold...
Jerry: Oh... You mean... shrinkage.
George: Yes. Significant shrinkage.
Jerry: So you feel you were short changed.
George: Yes! I mean, if she thinks that's me she's under a complete misapprehension. That was not me, Jerry. That was not me.
George: I was in the pool! I was in the pool!
• Vote for this Quote! • June 28th, 2007 George: Great, great. So anytime you want you can just visualize her naked.
Jerry: I guess that's true...
George: Stop it, stop it! It's not fair. It's not fair. I don't like this situation, Jerry. I don't like it one bit.
Jerry: What do you want me to do? You wanna see Rachel naked?
George: Yes, yes! The punishment should fit the crime.
Jerry: You can see me naked. I can offer you that.
George: Well, how good a look did you get?
Jerry: What do you mean?
George: Well, if she was a criminal and you had to describe her to a police-sketch artist...
Jerry: They'd pick her up in about ten minutes.
