Homer Simpson Quotes (Page 11)
Ned: Hi giggly hey neighbor!
Homer: OH MY GOD THIS DUDE DOES THE BEST FLANDERS! You got the moustache, and the diddly.
Ned: Heh heh heh...Homer it's me, Ned Flanders.
Homer: Oh right, the God dude.
Otto: "Shemp" is "hemp" spelled backwards!
Homer: Ha Ha! And "Otto" is "Otto" spelled backwards!
Otto: Oh, now I'm scared...
Homer: We killed Mr. Burns! Mr. Burns is gonna be so mad!
• Vote for this Quote! • July 29th, 2007Homer: Could Jesus microwave a burrito so hot that he himself could not eat it?
• Vote for this Quote! • July 29th, 2007 Homer: Our next story is Hamlet, by William Shakespeare.
Bart: Dad, these old stories can't compare with today's modern super-writers. Steven Bocho could kick Shakespeare's ass!
Lisa: Look, this story's more exciting than you think! Start's off with Hamlet's father getting murdered!
Bart: Cool! Does he get to marry his mom?
Homer: I don't know but that would be hot!
Moe: That's the best book I've ever seen!
Homer (looking in his World Records book): Nope. The best book you've ever seen is "Tom Clancy's Op-Center."
Moe: That thing knows me better than I know myself.
Garth: Nice work, Homer.
Homer: Before I bring the sugar in, I want to see the Oompa-Loompa!
Garth: He's right over there.
(points to the Oompa-Loompa, who is depressed and smoking a cigarette)
Homer: (to Bart) That guy is freaky.
Homer: You went to a sugar factory? Were there Oompa-Loompas?
Marge: There was one in a cage. But he wasn't moving.
Homer: Okay, Gabriel, this is a bar. It's where I go to drink alcohol, which is the mortal equivalent of your ambrosia.
Gabriel: Homer, I am not an angel.
Homer: Pfft. Well not with that temper.
[later]
Homer: [drunk] Look, the think about my family is, there's five of us: Marge, Bart, Girl Bart, the one who doesn't talk, and the fat guy. How I loathe him. [falls off the barstool]
Lisa: [in jail] Thanks a lot, everybody. Now, I'll never get into an Ivy League school.
Bart: [taunting] You're going to Stanford, you're going to Stanford ...[Homer joins in]
Homer and Bart: You're going to Stanford! You're going to Stanford!
Lisa: Take it back! Take it back!
Homer: