Homer Simpson Quotes (Page 16)
Ray Patterson: Sorry I'm late everyone. Somebody tampered with my brakes!
Homer: Well then you should have been early!
Moe: Whoa-oh, hey, you didn't pay for the beer.
Homer: Can't someone else do it?
[Homer walks out of the bar, while Moe is laughing]
Moe: [Holding a shotgun] Seriously, give me the money.
Marge: How could you spend $4.6 million in a month?
Homer: They let me sign checks with a stamp, Marge! A stamp!
Quimby: Simpson, you idiot! You spent your entire year's budget in a month! Your department's broke!
Homer: Uh...oh no! Wait! I think I've got the perfect solution.
Quimby: You'd better! Because those garbage men won't work for free!
Homer: D'oh!
Homer: This is a very, very proud day for us! Especially me, your father, me, beat City Hall! It's just like David and Goliath, only this time, David won!
Lisa's Brain: Oh, I know, I heard it too. Here's some music. [Beethoven's "Für Elise" plays.]
Homer: Does this make me look fat?
Lisa: No, it makes you look like a tool of government oppression.
Homer: But not fat?
Burns in a plane over the Caribbean: Any of these islands would make a fine new country.
Homer: I call president!
Burns: Vice president!
Smithers (disappointedly): Oooh...
Burns: Ooh... There's a big one, and it has freedom written all over it!
Smithers: Sir, that's Cuba.
Mr. Burns: Cuba, eh? Take her down, Smithers!
Smithers: Uh... You're flying the plane, sir.
Mr. Burns: Excellent.
Homer: I can't go to prison! They pee in a cup and throw it at you, I saw it in a movie.
Johnson: You won't be seeing any prison movies where you're going - prison!
Homer: Would you look at those idiots? I paid my taxes over a year ago!
• Rating 4.7 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • July 26th, 2007Homer: But Mr. Burns gave me my job, and he hasn't fired me even after three meltdowns and one China Syndrome! I can't betray him!
• Vote for this Quote! • July 26th, 2007