Jack Donaghy Quotes
Tracy: No, Dad! Don't die! I love you Dad! I don't wanna dogfight no more!
Jack (normal voice): Tracy that's it! That's it!
Tracy (to therapist): Thank you for showing me there really is love in my family after all. And I need to stay the hell away from them. (to Jack) Donaghy, you're the only family I need, Jackie D.
Jack: You got that right, Tre. You know it's too bad you didn't know Howard Cossell when you were growing up because I had that one in my pocket the whole time.
Therapist: I think we're just doing Good Times now.
Tracy: Now do the white dude that my moms left my dad for.
Jack (with a stuffed-up voice): Now see hear Tracy, it's impolite to slurp one's soup.
Tracy: Whoa, no need to resort to ugly stereotypes.
Tracy: I'm mad at you, Dad.
Jack (imitating Redd Foxx): Hey, dummy, I'm mad at you too. Why ya gotta act up that way?!
Therapist: Um, t-that's not exactly what I had in mind.
Tracy: Cuz you left me, Dad!
Devon: You familiar with the Church of Practicology?
Jack: You mean the cult that was invented by Stan Lee?
Devon: No, I mean the religion founded by the alien king living inside Stan Lee.
Jack: All right, Jerry, what NBC shows do you want to be digitally inserted into?
Seinfeld: I like Lost. Is that you guys?
Jack: She needs to lose thirty pounds or gain sixty. Anything in between has no place on television.
• Rating 5.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • October 15th, 2007 Phoebe: Hello.
Jack: Uh, Mother, this is Phoebe. Phoebe, this is my mother.
Phoebe: Hello, Mother Donaghy, I'm Phoebe! It's such a pleasure to meet you. I love your little hat.
Colleen: [stares disapprovingly] Oh, my God.
Colleen: Well, well, well, well, well, this must be the one, huh? Phoebe! Welcome.
Jack: No, no.
Liz: No, I-
Colleen: Welcome, welcome, welcome!
Jack: Mother, mother! This is not Phoebe.
Liz: No.
Colleen: This is not Phoebe? Well, why the hell not? I mean, she's perfect. Character, she got strength of character... and I tell you something else; she's got a good, solid... baby bucket.
Liz: You are a sassy old broad, aren't you?
Liz: His name's Floyd.
Jack: That's unfortunate.
Jack: You've been avoiding me, Lemon.
Liz: How do you do that without turning around?
Jack: To be perfectly honest, the first couple of people I did that to were not you, but...here we are.