Jerry Seinfeld Quotes (Page 16)
Jerry: We're not gay. Not that there's anything wrong with that!
• Rating 5.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • June 27th, 2007Jerry: Looking at a cleavage is like looking at the sun. You don't stare at it. It's too risky. You get a sense of it and then you look away.
• Rating 4.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • June 27th, 2007 Cheryl: "Do you ever laugh?"
Jerry: "Not really. Sometimes when I'm in the tub..."
Cheryl: "That's so sad. What do you do?"
Jerry: "I'm a comedian."
Jerry: Well, I mean birthdays are merely symbolic of how another year's gone by and how little we've grown. No matter how desperate we are that someday a better self will emerge, with each flicker of the candles on the cake we know it's not to be. That for the rest of our sad, wretched, pathetic lives, this is who we are to the bitter end. Inevitably, irrevocably. Happy birthday? No such thing.
• Vote for this Quote! • June 27th, 2007Jerry: If we pick, do we not bleed?
• Vote for this Quote! • June 27th, 2007 Elaine: What happened?
Jerry: I told her about the contest.
Elaine: Oh, boy, she's a whack-o.
Marla: Contest?! A contest! This is what you do with your friends?
Jerry: No, it was just a bet. I mean, it actually started with George and his mother-
Marla: I don't want to hear another word. And to think how close I came to you being the one! I must have been out of my mind.
Jerry: All right, Costanza. It's just you and me.
George: And then, there were two.
Elaine: Elaine Benes Kennedy Junior.
George: You caved?!
Jerry: It's over?!
George: You're out?!
Jerry: Oh my God, the Queen is dead! What happened?
Elaine: It was, uh, John John.
Jerry and George: Ohhhhh. John John.
Kramer: [looking out the window] Oh, that's good. That's good. That's very, very good. Oh, it's hot in there. It's hot in there. So, just walk around a little bit. Don't be ashamed, don't be ashamed.. that's good, good.. yes, yes, yes.
Jerry: [singing along with the TV] The wheels on the bus go round and round, round and round, round and round. The wheels on the bus...
Kramer: [singing] The woman across the street has nothing on, nothing on, nothing on...
