Jim Halpert Quotes
Dwight: Second Life is not a game. It is a multi-user, virtual environment. It doesn't have points or scores. It doesn't have winners or losers.
Jim: Oh, it has losers.
Jim: I think it's great that the company's making a commercial. Because not very many people have heard of us. I mean, when I tell people that I work at Dunder Mifflin, they think that we sell mufflers. Or muffins. Or mittens. And frankly, all of those sound better than paper, so I let it slide.
• Rating 5.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • October 30th, 2007 Jim: Did I ever tell you why I left Scranton?
Dwight: [cries quietly]
Jim: Yeah, I didn't think I had. Well, it was all about Pam. Yeah, I mean, she was with Roy... and I just couldn't take it. I mean, I lost it, Dwight. I couldn't sleep, I couldn't concentrate on anything. And then weird stuff, like, food had no taste. So my solution was to move away. It was awful. And it's something that I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. And that includes you.
Ryan: What I really want, honestly, Michael, is for you to know it so you can communicate it to the people here, to your clients, to whomever.
Michael: Oh okay...
Ryan: What?
Michael: It's whoever, not whomever.
Ryan: No, it's whomever.
Michael: No, whomever is never actually right.
Jim: Well, sometimes it's right.
Creed: Michael is right. It's a made-up word used to trick students.
Andy: No. Actually, whomever is the formal version of the word.
Oscar: Obviously it's a real word, but I don't know when to use it correctly.
Michael: Not a native speaker.
Dwight: Schrute Farms, guten tag! How may I help you?...Yes we have availability on those nights...How many in your party?...Oh no, I'm sorry, no king beds...No queen either...Well, we make our own mattresses that don't conform to the usual sizes. Closest would be twin...Thank you so much for calling. Call back again, auf wiedersehen!
Jim: Hey, Dwight.
Dwight: None of your business, Jim.
Jim: There's this cube on the screen which bounces around all day. And sometimes, it looks like it's going right in the corner of the screen and at the last minute it hits the wall and bounces away. We are all just dying to see it go right into the corner. Pam claims that she saw it one day when she was alone in the conference room. Okay. I believe she thinks she saw it.
Pam: I saw it. I saw it and it was amazing. Who said I didn't see it? Did Jim say that I didn't see it? I saw it!
Jim: Do you remember what you said to me on my first day of work, just before you walked me over to my desk?
Pam: Yeah ... 'enjoy this moment, because you're never going to go back to this time before you met your desk-mate Dwight.'
Jim: That's when I knew. You?
Pam: You came up to my desk and you said, 'this might sound weird, and there's no reason for me to know this, but that mixed berry yogurt you're about to eat is expired.'
Jim: That was the moment that you knew you liked me.
Pam: Yep.
Jim: Wow. Can we make it a different moment?
Pam: Nope.
Michael: You guys should come over for dinner. You and Pam, that'd be fun. Friday? Wanna come over Friday?
Jim: Aw... can't.
Michael: After work, you can?
Jim: Oh no... 'cause... you're gonna let me know when we're close right?
Andy: And then I will say something positive like, 'kudos!' Or 'job well done!'
Jim: Or zippity do da.
Andy: I can't tell if he's mocking me.
Dwight: Just ignore him.
Andy: I can't do that. It's really hard for me to let things go.
Jim: I was mocking you.
Andy: Thank you.
Michael: Okay. Today is the big day that I am heading to New York to attend a party, with sushi and important people. On an unrelated note, if anyone has an anecdote, that is not boring and easy to memorize please drop by my office before I leave. Thank you.
Jim: Whoops. Is that what Ryan really wanted you to tell us?
Michael: And... today the Dunder Mifflin Infinity website launches.
