Jim Halpert Quotes (Page 4)
Michael: So I am instituting "prima nocte."
Jim: [talking head] "Prima nocte", I believe from the movie Braveheart and confirmed on Wikipedia, is when the king got to deflower every new bride on her wedding night. So...
Michael: I'm sorry, I had a very different understanding as to what "prima nocte" meant.
Jim: (looking at the hole) Oh my God. That's half-inch drywall.
Pam: I think we broke his brain.
Jim: Hey, Ryan. Do you want to pull a prank on Andy?
Ryan: Not right now. But ask me again ten years ago.
Jim: I liked you better as the temp.
Ryan: Me too.
Jim: I miss Dwight. Congratulations, universe. You win.
• Rating 2.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • June 29th, 2007Jim: After you, sir
Dwight: No thank you, I never let anyone walk behind me. 7 out of 10 attacks are from the rear.
Jim: Okay, that still leaves a 30% chance that I'll attack you from the front.
Dwight: Uh, yeah, but it'll be easier to stop. I can always block the blow and counter it - (Jim slaps him and walks away smiling)
Jim: Ah, young Jim. There's just so much I need to warn you about. And yet, tragically, I cannot
• Rating 5.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • June 29th, 2007 Dwight : I like Karen. She’s pretty. Appears intelligent.
Jim : Well, I like pretty women who have the appearance of intelligence.
Dwight : My girlfriend is also beautiful and smart. She could be a model. Or a college professor. Which is intimidating to a lot of guys.
Jim : We should go on a double date.
Dwight : [scoffs] No thank you.
Jim : Seriously, you’re gonna sit in the back?
Dwight : Uh, yeah. It’s the safest part of a car. In the event of a crash, the driver always protects his side first.
[Jim hits the brakes and Dwight slams his head into the back of the seat]
Michael: The Jamaicans don't have a word for "impossible."
Jim: Yep, it's English. It's "impossible."
Michael: I need my entourage. Jim, Dwight, Ryan, c'mon - we're going to Asian Hooters.
Ryan: I'm not feeling so well. I've got a ton of work to do here. MSG allergy, peanut allergy, I just ate there last night.
Michael: [feels Ryan's head] Alright, feel better.
Jim: Wow, thanks for taking all the excuses, dude.
Ryan: Doctor appointment, car trouble, plantar warts, granddad fought in World War II. Use your head, man. I keep mine in here [shows Blackberry]. Look alive, Halpert. Welcome back.
