Jim Halpert Quotes (Page 5)
Jim: It's a bold move to Photoshop yourself into a picture with your girlfriend and her kids on a ski trip with their real father. But then again, Michael's a bold guy. [pause] Is bold the right word?
• Vote for this Quote! • June 28th, 2007 Jim: Quick question — do you play the guitar?
Andy: I play the banjo.
Jim: Hold on, let me think about that...yes, that'll work. But can you sing in a sexy high falsetto voice?
Andy: [singing] You know I can, my man.
Jim: [giving "advice" to Andy about Pam] She loves hunting. She also loves the ads for Six Flags, with the old guy. Also, do you speak pig latin?
• Vote for this Quote! • June 28th, 2007 Jim: [picking up phone] Jim Halpert.
Andy: I am so horny.
Jim: Okay, I can't help you with that.
Andy: Oh, I think you can, Big Tuna. Tell me about that Indian chick, Kelly. She seems pretty slutty. Good for a romp in the sack.
Jim: She is dating Ryan, I think.
Andy: Oh, and I care why?
Jim: She's high-maintenance.
Andy: Next. How about...[sees Meredith walk by] Angela. Blondes are more fun. C'mon, trust me on that.
Jim: Yeah, trust me, that would be fun for no one.
Jim: I always knew that the branch would shut down someday. I just figured it would be because Michael would sell the building for some magic beans.
• Vote for this Quote! • June 28th, 2007 Jim: I don’t have a ton of contact with the Scranton branch, but before I left, I took a box of Dwight’s stationery, so from time to time I send Dwight faxes. From himself. From the future. [reading fax] "Dwight, at 8am today, someone poisons the coffee. Do not drink the coffee. More instructions will follow. Cordially, Future Dwight."
[Dwight receives the fax and reads it. He spots Stanley about to drink a cup of coffee]
Dwight: Noooooooooo! [smacks the cup out of Stanley's hands] You'll thank me later.
Jim: Once a quarter, the sales staff at this branch has to stay late to do order form consolidation, which, amazingly, is even less intersting than it sounds.
• Vote for this Quote! • June 28th, 2007Jim: I started biking to work. Josh does it, and he lives a lot farther away than I do. And also, it saves gas money, keeps me in shape, helps the environment, and now I know it makes me really sweaty for work.
• Vote for this Quote! • June 28th, 2007 Pam: What time is it there?
Jim: What time is it here? Um, we're in the same time zone.
Pam: Uh, oh, yeah, right.
Jim: How far away did you think we were?
Pam: I don't know. It felt far.
Jim: [pause] Yeah.
Jim: That is a lot of liquor. And...a dartboard.
• Vote for this Quote! • June 28th, 2007
