Joey Tribbiani Quotes (Page 5)
Chandler: Hey, Joe, I gotta ask. The girl from the Xerox place buck naked [holds up one hand], or, or a big tub of jam. [holds up the other hand]
Joey: Put your hands together
Joey: Okay, buddy boy, here it is. You hide my clothes, I'm wearing everything you own.
Chandler: Oh, my God! That is so not the opposite of taking somebody's underwear!
Joey: Look at me! I'm Chandler! Could I be wearing any more clothes? Maybe if I wasn't going commando!
Joey: "Okay you hide my underwear, I'm gonna do the exact opposite to you!"
Chandler: "Oh, What are you gonna do? Show me my clothes?
Joey: "Hey opposite ... Is Opposite!"
Chandler: "He's got nothing!"
Joey [to Chandler]: Where's my underwear?
Ross: Woah woah...come on, you took his underwear?
Chandler: He took my essence!
Ross: Okay Joey, hold on. Why can't you just wear the underwear you're wearing now?
Joey: Because I'm not wearing any underwear now.
Ross: Okay, um, then, why do you have to wear underwear tonight?
Joey: It's a rented tux, 'kay? I'm not gonna go commando in another man's fatigues.
Chandler: All right, you will notice that I am fully dressed. I, in turn, have noticed that you are not. So in the words of A. A. Milne, "Get out of my chair, dillhole!"
Joey: Okay
[Joey gets up and takes the cushions]
Chandler: What are you doing?
Joey: You said I had to give you the chair. You didn't say anything about the cushions.
Chandler: The cushions are the essence of the chair!
Joey: THAT'S RIGHT! I'm taking the essence.
Joey: All right, they got water, orange juice...and what looks like cider.
Chandler: Taste it.
[Joey drinks it, and puts it back in the fridge]
Joey [mad]: Yeah, it's fat. I DRANK FAT!
Chandler: Yeah I know, I did that two minutes ago.
Joey: Look, what do you want me to say?
Chandler: I want you to say that you like her!
Joey: I can't. It's like this chemical thing, you know. Every time she starts laughing, I just wanna… pull my arm off just so that I can have something to throw at her.
Chandler: Thanks for trying. Oh, and by the way, there is no "Count Rushmore"!
Joey: Oh, yeah? Then who's the guy that painted the faces on the mountain?
Chandler: Joey, Joey. Hey, some girl just walked up to me and said, 'I want you Dennis,' and stuck her tounge down my throat. I love this party.
Joey: Quick volleyball question.
Chandler: Volleyball
Joey: Yeah, we set up a court in your room. Uh, you didn't really like that grey lamp, did you?
Chandler: Joey, a woman just stuck her tongue down my throat, I'm not even listening to you.
Girl's Voice: Dennis!
Chandler: Ok, that's me.
Monica: My motto is get out before they go down.
Joey: That is so not my motto.
Joey [to Ross]: Haven't you ever gotten beat up before?
Ross: Yeah.
Joey: I mean by someone besides Monica.
Ross: No...
