Kitty Forman Quotes (Page 3)
Mr. Burkhart: Now, the most important part of our presidential rally is the townspeople's Q&A section.
Bob: Just so everyone's clear, the Q stand for question, the A for answer. All yours, Jeb.
Mr. Burkhart: This is when normal folks step up to the microphone and ask the President questions, now you the important thing is to chose the right person. A working class guy, your average Joe. I guess someone you and I would call loser.
Red: Eric, say that your job was sent to a plant in what-the-hell-who-the-hell cares. Now, are you gonna vote for the guy that let that happen?
Kitty: Red, President Ford didn't take your job, he took Nixon's.
Red: Eric, we're waiting.
Eric: Uh, well, I believe that everyone's political opinion is valid and worth hearing.
Red: Well, that's, that's perfect Eric. Use that line when you're on for Miss America.
Kitty: Birthday breakfast! And this is it young man. A few gifts tonight and that's the end. And it is too late to change your mind about a party now so don't think you're getting one or you will be sorely disappointed! [she laughs]
Red: Happy birthday. You know, the lawn's not gonna cut itself.
[Red & Kitty leave]
Eric: Thanks mom, dad.
Laurie: Hey little brother, nice tent!
Eric: Oh Laurie, I just remembered, I can't loan you the VistaCruiser on account of I hate you.
Red: Laurie, you're not driving the VistaCruiser. It's old and undependable. It could break down and you'd be at the mercy of any maniac who came along. That's okay for Eric. But you're taking the Toyota. Oh, and here's a twenty.
Laurie: Will that cover gas?
Kitty: Oh well, it should. Honey, honey, give her another ten just in case.
Eric: I could probably use some gas money.
Red: Yeah. And if a frog had wings, he wouldn't bump his ass when he hops.
Red: So, how's your friend Janice?
Laurie: Pregnant.
Kitty: Oh, she was such a nice girl, how does that happen?
Eric: Well, first the egg travels down the fallopian tube to the uterus where it attaches to the wall...
Red: Eric, for God's Sakes, that's no language for a woman to hear!
Laurie: It's okay Red, I know what a fallopian tube is. I think mom does too.
[Fantasy scene]
Mr. Burkhart: Hi Red, say isn't it great all our kids are such good friends?
Bob: Yes, Jackie's dad. They're quite the gang of young people! Hahaha!
Midge: Kitty, I love what you've done with the kitchen.
Kitty: Yes, aqua and yellow. Blah blah blah, yak, yak, yak.
Mr. Burkhart: Speaking of kids, wasn't it lucky Triple A pulled Eric's butt out of the fire when he took the car to Milwaukee without your permission?
Red: What? Why, that twisted little monkey! I'm grounding him for ten years.
Mr. Burkhart: Kids, what are you gonnna do?
Red: I say we torture them with plenty of pointless rules and advice!
Kitty: A car is not a bedroom on wheels.
• Rating 5.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • March 23rd, 2007
