Lenny Leonard Quotes (Page 2)
Carl: ...Let's make litter out of these literati!
Lenny: That's too clever, you're one of them!
Marge: The first house I have to show you is, um... a handyman's dream. [smiles half-heartedly and lets out an "Mm-hmm"] Because it's so dilapidated. [groans]
Ned Flanders: Well, nothing's perfect. I sure hate to make you come out here and not buy a house.
Maude Flanders: Now, slow down, Neddie. The home buyer's course said always look inside the house before buying.
(Front wall of the main part of the house falls down to reveal that this is where Lenny Leonard lives. The interior is also dilapidated and is mostly empty)
Marge: Well, there it is.
Lenny: Please don't tell anyone how I live.
Frank Grimes: [disgusted that Homer is not being chastised for entering a children's contest] But... this was a contest for children!
Lenny: Yeah, and Homer beat their brains out.
Frank Grimes: Homer is not okay! I would die a happy man if I could prove to you that Homer Simpson has the intelligence of a six year old!
Lenny: [to Carl, ignoring Frank] So, how are you doing?
Frank Grimes: God. He eats like a pig.
Lenny: I dunno. Pigs tend to chew. I'd say he eats more like a duck.
Frank Grimes: Well, some kind of farm animal anyway. And earlier today, I saw him asleep inside a radiation suit. Can you imagine that? He was hanging from a coat hook.
Lenny: Yeah, he had three beers at lunch. That would make anybody sleepy.
Frank Grimes: I've never seen him do any work around here. What is his job?
Lenny: Safety inspector.
Frank Grimes: That irresponsible oaf?! A man who by all rights should have been killed dozens of times by now?!
Lenny: Umm, 316 times by my count.
Frank Grimes: That's the man who's in charge of our safety? It boggles the mind!
Carl: Yeah, it's best not to think about it.
Frank Grimes: Accidents have doubled every year since he became safety inspector, and meltdowns have tripled! Has he been fired? No. Has he been disciplined? No, no!
Lenny: Everyone makes mistakes. That's why they put erasers on pencils.
Lenny (at Burns' desk, he activates the PA): Uh, attention everyone... (pauses) Um, work harder! Bye!
• Vote for this Quote! • July 24th, 2007 Skinner: Ah, there's no justice like angry mob justice.
Lenny: I'm gonna burn all the historical memorabilia.
Moe: I'm gonna bag me a toilet!
Willie: Agh, there'd better be two!
Fish: (singing) Homer loves Mindy! Homer loves Mindy!
Carl: (inside Homer's head) Hey, Homer... you're hallucinating again.
Lenny: (inside Homer's head) Not a good sign.
Barney: TAKE THAT SNAKE!! (hits ground) AND YOU TOO!! (hits ground again) SNAKES!! SNAKES EVERYWHERE!!!!
Lenny: Hey, ya getting ready for Whacking Day?
Barney: What's Whacking Day?