Lisa Simpson Quotes (Page 9)
Lisa: Bart's pain is funny, but mine isn't.
• Vote for this Quote! • July 18th, 2007 Lisa: Dad! You shouldn't wear glasses that weren't prescribed for you!
Homer: (looking at Bart) Lisa just because you're ten feet tall doesn't mean you can tell me what to do.
Bart (after Itchy makes Scratchy into a tent): The guys who wrote this cartoon don't know squat. Itchy should have tied Scratchy's tongue with a taut-line hitch, not a sheet bend.
Lisa: Come on, Bart. Cartoons don't have to be 100% realistic.
Lisa: You've become a product of our quick fix, one-hour photo, instant oatmeal society.
• Vote for this Quote! • July 18th, 2007 Homer: It was so nice of Mr. Burns to invite us to a midnight dinner at his country house in... Pennsylvania!
Lisa: Aw, there's something fishy about this whole setup.
Marge: Lisa, stop being so suspicious. Did everyone wash their necks like Mr. Burns asked?
Lisa: Bart, I figured it out! Who's someone you've been making irritating phone calls to?
Bart: Linda Lavin?
Lisa: No, someone who didn't deserve it!
[Marge, Lisa, Homer and Maggie are tied up to the mast, Homer is laying there on the floor asleep drooling on the floor.]
Lisa: Oh no, Dad's been drugged!
Marge: [irritated] No he hasn't.
[On "Up Late with McBain," Rainier Wolfcastle razzes his band leader.]
Rainier Wolfcastle: Nice shirt, it makes you look like a homosexual.
[Audience boos.]
Rainier Wolfcastle: Maybe you all are homosexuals too.
[Audience boos again. Bart and Lisa watch on TV.]
Bart: This is horrible.
Lisa: The Fox Network has sunk to a new low.
Lisa: Let's see Bass, Bass. "Tiny Tim" "The Chipmunk's Greatest Hits" "A Castrati Christmass"? UGH!!
Barry White: (singing) Can't get enough of your love, babe... (Bart & Lisa supprised & rush to the door)
Lisa: Mr. White, can we borrow you for a minute?
Barry White: Anything for a lady.
Lisa: Dad, everyone likes Whacking Day, but I hate it! Is there something wrong with me?
Homer: Yes, honey.
Lisa: Then what should I do?
Homer: Just squeeze your anger into a ball, and release it at the right moment! Like that one time I hit the referee with the whiskey bottle remember that?
Lisa: Yeah...
Homer: When daddy hit the referee?
Lisa: Yeah...
Homer: Yeah...