Lois Griffin Quotes (Page 18)

Dysfunctional Family

Peter Griffin: Lois...Lois, what's the matter?
Lois Griffin: Oh...I just had the strangest dream. Something about Stewie... and Cheerios... huh, it's gone.

  • Vote for this Quote! • July 5th, 2007


Lois Griffin: Stewie! All these months I should have been paying attention to what you've been saying! You're an evil child. Why, why did I have to go and smoke pot when I was pregnant with you?!?
Stewie Griffin: Cheer up Mother, you should be proud. You've given birth to the future emperor of the world. Pity you won't be around to enjoy it. Cheerio!

  • Vote for this Quote! • July 5th, 2007


Lois Griffin: [in a dream] My God, it all makes sense now. My baby is some kind of diabolical genius bent on world domination!
Stewie Griffin: [clapping] Bravo, Lois. The last horse finally crosses the finish line.

  • Vote for this Quote! • July 5th, 2007


Lois: Oh, "The Old Man and the Sea". I see you're getting in the mood for our cruise.
Peter: Yeah. Stupid fisherman, sitting out there on a boat yammering to himself. He doesn't even know I'm watching him.

  • Vote for this Quote! • February 11th, 2007


Lois: Oh, look, Meg, it's your little baby booties. Oh, and your little bronze hat. And your tail.
Meg: My what?
Lois: Nothing.

  • Vote for this Quote! • February 11th, 2007



Lois: Have you been drinking?
Peter: Why, yes, I have. Thank you.

  • Vote for this Quote! • February 11th, 2007


Lois: Oh, my God! You can only play the piano when you're drunk!
Peter: Now that's not true! I can also vomit, fall down and make dirty calls to your sister when I'm drunk!

  • Vote for this Quote! • February 11th, 2007


Lois: You're drunk again.
Peter: No, I'm just exhausted 'cause I've been up all night drinking.

  • Vote for this Quote! • February 11th, 2007


Lois: My days in college were so exciting. This one time, the national guard came and shot some of my friends.

  • Vote for this Quote! • February 11th, 2007


Lois: Oh, I haven't been on a college campus in years. Everything seems so different.
Stewie: Really? Perhaps if you laid on your back with your ankles behind your ears that would ring a few bells.

  • Vote for this Quote! • February 11th, 2007


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Total Quotes: 208