Michael Bluth Quotes (Page 8)

Sibling Rivalry: Bluth Style

Michael: They don’t like Nip/Tuck?
George Michael: Well, you know, they don’t like anything. Something about God wants people to age naturally, or, I don’t know. Ironically, she likes Gangee.

  • Vote for this Quote! • August 13th, 2007


Gob: And I'm going to need help getting out of this marriage.
Barry: Oh, well, I got Michael out of his marriage didn't I?
Michael: Actually, she died.
Barry: Yeah! we killed her! [goes to give a high-five]
Michael: No, she actually died.
Barry: You're kidding. I've been taking credit for that for years.

  • Vote for this Quote! • August 9th, 2007


Tobias: You know, Michael, perhaps I should buy YOU that tape recorder. Do you have any idea how often you say the word afraid?
Michael: Well, I... I know I used it in the Jacuzzi.
Tobias: And I apologize for that. I thought it was a pool toy.

  • Vote for this Quote! • August 9th, 2007


Tobias: Well, Michael, you really are quite the Cupid, aren’t you? I tell you, you can zing your arrow into my buttocks any time.
Michael: Okay, you know what you do? You buy yourself a tape recorder, you just record yourself for a whole day. I think you’re going to be surprised at some of your phrasing.

  • Rating 5.0 / 5Vote for this Quote! • August 9th, 2007


Michael: Sorry. Your grandmother had a little accident here.
George Michael: Oh. Does that mean she’s going to have to come live with us?
Michael: No, no. No. It was her drink, and even if it wasn’t...

  • Vote for this Quote! • August 9th, 2007



Lucille: She’d love to get at me any way she could. That’s why she’s been flirting with G.O.B. She’s trying to prove that she’s closer to my children than I am, but the joke’s on her, because she doesn’t know how little I care for Gob.
Michael: I think that makes the joke on Gob.

  • Vote for this Quote! • August 9th, 2007


Lucille: I think the company is in trouble.
Michael: What tipped you? The falling profits, or that we’re a regular feature on Bill O’Reilly’s “Most Ridiculous Item of the Day.”

  • Vote for this Quote! • August 9th, 2007


Michael: So what'd'ya say? We've got a basket of father son fun here.
George Michael: What's Kama sutra oil'?
Michael: Maybe that's not for us.

  • Vote for this Quote! • August 9th, 2007


Tobias: Well, yes, but I’m afraid I prematurely shot my wad on what was supposed to be a dry run, if you will, so now I’m afraid I have something of a mess on my hands.
Michael: It's just there's so many poorly chosen words in that sentence.

  • Vote for this Quote! • August 9th, 2007


Tobias: My wife is humiliated. This is my chance to right the small wrong that I did.
Michael: You shot her in the ass with about four ounces of horse tranquilizer.
Tobias: I haven’t been the perfect husband ... yes, I admit that. But now is my chance to be a hero.

  • Vote for this Quote! • August 9th, 2007


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Total Quotes: 229