Michael Scott Quotes (Page 11)
Pam: [seeing a picture of Michael and Jan in Jamaica] Oh my God, is that Jan?
Michael: No...that's a German woman named...Urkel...grue.
Michael: The Jamaicans don't have a word for "impossible."
Jim: Yep, it's English. It's "impossible."
Michael: You know what? Pam, make a note - I want us all to start having Pina Coladas every day at 3.
• Rating 5.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • June 29th, 2007Michael: [to Stanley] You are not as much fun as your Jamaican bra-das, mon.
• Vote for this Quote! • June 29th, 2007 Michael: You know I had never been out of the country before now? Got to see how Jamaicans live, it is great! You know? They just relax, they party all the time...
Pam: It's kind of an impoverished country.
Michael: Yeah...gosh...great...
Michael: Bros before hoes. Why? Because your bros are always there for you. They got your back after your ho rips your heart out for no good reason. And you were nothing but great to your ho, and you told her that she was the only ho for you. And that she was better than all the other hoes in the world. And then suddenly...she's not yo' ho no mo'.
• Rating 4.9 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • June 28th, 2007 Michael: I need my entourage. Jim, Dwight, Ryan, c'mon - we're going to Asian Hooters.
Ryan: I'm not feeling so well. I've got a ton of work to do here. MSG allergy, peanut allergy, I just ate there last night.
Michael: [feels Ryan's head] Alright, feel better.
Jim: Wow, thanks for taking all the excuses, dude.
Ryan: Doctor appointment, car trouble, plantar warts, granddad fought in World War II. Use your head, man. I keep mine in here [shows Blackberry]. Look alive, Halpert. Welcome back.
[Michael is lying behind the reception desk, we only see his legs sticking out from it.]
Michael: It hurts my heart. It hurts my stomach. It hurts my arms.
Pam: Okay, well why are you laying like that?
Michael: Hey! I would like a nice slice of Christmas Pam. Side of candy Pams. And perhaps some Pam chops. With mint...
Pam: Can I help you, Michael?
Michael: Close your eyes. Picture a convict. What's he wearing? Nothing special. Baseball cap on backwards. Baggy pants. He says something ordinary, like 'Yo, that's shizzle.' Okay, now slowly open your eyes again. Who were you picturing? A black man? Wrong. That was a white woman. Surprised? Well, shame on you.
• Rating 4.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • June 28th, 2007