Nancy Botwin Quotes (Page 4)
Nancy: What do you do if somebody actually calls to get his house cleaned?
Heylia: Then I refer ‘em to my cousin Zondra, who cleans for real. She don’t make s**t, but Zondra found the Lord so she don’t care.
Mr. Norman: (leans toward Nancy accusingly) I know what you did. I know you stole that goat. Goat thief!
Nurse: Mr. Norman, step back into your line.
Mr. Norman: (towards Nancy) It’s the economy stupid. But that goat didn’t belong to you, it was a free goat.
Shane: (from other side) Mom, it really hurts. It’s throbbing.
Mr. Norman: (whiny) ‘It’s throbbing, Mom.’
Nancy: Back off, nutty!
Mr. Norman: (turns away, turns back, leans down towards Shane, whining and mocking) Ah, cry baby, wha, wha.
Nancy: I’m gonna take your free goat and shove it straight up your ass.
Mr. Norman: (straightening up) What goat?
Nancy: All bun?
Conrad: No, uh… hot dog.
Heylia: [playing dominoes] Oh, you poor schmuck, you just played wrong. That’s a boat!
Nancy: Wait, a boat is when the four ends add up to 20?
Heylia: A boat is when I spank this boy’s black ass for thinking he all that with his three switchin’ bitches.
Nancy: Three switchin’ bitches?
Conrad: It’s 15. And a boat is 20. Stop f**kin’ with her, she’s just tryin’ to learn the game.
Shane Botwin: Can we go home now, please?
Nancy: It’s not even halftime.
Shane: I don’t feel well. I think I have rickets.
Nancy: (sees Shane get knocked down on soccer field) Foul! Ref, what’s the matter with your whistle?!
Celia Hodes: Well, technically, Nancy, the Ref can’t call a foul. Shane was kicked by his own teammates.
Josh: Shit hasn’t gone this fast since the Passion of the Christ.
Nancy: People got stoned for the Passion of the Christ? That’s disturbing.
Josh: It’s not as disturbing as seeing it not stoned. Religion my ass. It’s a straight up snuff film.
Nancy Botwin: Maybe black people need to start stealin’ a little bit bigger.
Conrad Sheperd: Maybe f**kin’ so.