Peter Griffin Quotes (Page 33)
Lois Griffin: Peter, you can't just pull the kids out of school for a baseball game.
Peter Griffin: Ah, there's nothing these kids learn in school they can't learn on the street.
Peter Griffin: Lois...Lois, what's the matter?
Lois Griffin: Oh...I just had the strangest dream. Something about Stewie... and Cheerios... huh, it's gone.
Lois: Oh, "The Old Man and the Sea". I see you're getting in the mood for our cruise.
Peter: Yeah. Stupid fisherman, sitting out there on a boat yammering to himself. He doesn't even know I'm watching him.
Couselor: Mr. Griffin, I've been watching you, and I don't think you're an addict.
Peter: Well I'm not paying you to think, hot lips! Count it! (Does basketball hand motion.)
Peter: Brian, it's moments like this that make me sad you're gonna die fifty years before I do.
• Vote for this Quote! • February 11th, 2007Doctor: Wait a minute, Brian, you have a pre-existing relationship with this degenerate?
Peter: A degenerate, am I? Well you are a festizio! See, I can make up words too, sister.
Lois: So how was your day?
Brian: My day? Un-freakin' believable. First we nailed this bastard who had the gall to hide his stuff in his daughter's doll--HER DOLL for God's sake! Where's the line anymore? Well, I got news for ya, it's not even on the radar screen! The days of decency and virtue are gone, honey, BAM, freakin' evaporated like a dingy stinkin' mudpuddle. One day you see your reflection in it and the next day it's a, it's a damn oil spot on your cracked driveway, staring back at you, mocking you, knowing the perverted truths that rot in the pit of your soul. That's how my freakin' day was!
[pause]
Peter Griffin: You know what I haven't had in a while? Big League Chew.
Chris: Hey, dad, look! I covered my back with honey and now the ants are taking me home.
Peter: He does the same thing at home with Velveeta and c**kroaches. If you turn the light on really fast they slam him right into the fridge.
Peter: The lesson here is that abusing alcohol has absolutely no negative consequences. You have your trophy and my brain cells are just fine.
• Vote for this Quote! • February 11th, 2007Peter: Lois, everyone has their sanctuary. The Catholics have churches, fat people have Wisconsin, and I have the Pawtucket Brewery.
• Vote for this Quote! • February 11th, 2007
