Peter Griffin Quotes (Page 37)
Peter: Woah! Is that really the blood of Christ?
Priest: Yes.
Peter: Man, that guy must have been wasted 24 hours a day, huh?
Peter: My son here is gonna be the best thing to happen in New York since Mayor Giuliani had all the homeless people secretly killed.
• Vote for this Quote! • February 11th, 2007Peter: There's gotta be an explanation for all this.
Brian: You want an explanation? God is pissed!
Peter: Tonight Katie Couric guest stars as a very perky crack whore.
• Vote for this Quote! • February 10th, 2007Peter: I'm just a big fake, like the moon landing and Marky Mark's hog in Boogie Nights and Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman. I don't mean that completely unproved gay rumor, they're just both really phony.
• Vote for this Quote! • February 10th, 2007Brian: Peter, this is the final plague.
Peter: Good cause this is starting to get boring.
Brian: Peter, the final plague is the death of the first born son.
Peter: Oh no Stewie!
Brian: First born...
Peter: Meg!
Brian: Your daughter...
Peter: Chris!
Peter: Hey Lois, give Chris a break. I mean, no tv? So he failed a class, it's not like he felt up his cousin in the garage that one time when I was 19.
• Vote for this Quote! • February 10th, 2007Peter: Are you gonna eat that stapler?
TV Executive: You...can't eat a stapler.
Peter: Wanna split it?
Peter: I'll handle it, Lois. I read a book about this sort of thing once.
Brian: Are you sure it was a book? Are you sure it wasn't nothing?
Peter: Oh yeah.
Peter: What am I supposed to do with all my great ideas? Put 'em in a tub and clean myself with them? That's what soap is for, Lois.
• Vote for this Quote! • February 10th, 2007
