Glenn Quagmire Quotes (Page 5)
Brian Griffin: Were you followed?
Lois Griffin: Don't worry, I've got a decoy.
[cutaway to Spooner Street, where Chris, dressed as Lois, pushes Stewie in a stroller down the sidewalk]
Glenn Quagmire: Hey, Lois. Hubba-hubba... whoa, Lois! You've put on a few, huh?
Chris Griffin: Well, I never! [slaps Quagmire]
Stewie Griffin: That's all right, honey. I didn't think he was the one, anyway. Now, let's go get sundaes.
Glenn Quagmire: [to a woman] If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together! [to another woman] Hey, you must be a parking ticket, 'cause you've got "fine" written all over you. [to two women having a conversation] Hey there, I don't want to come between you... or do I?
• Vote for this Quote! • July 6th, 2007Glenn Quagmire: Gosh, I never had to entertain kids before. [pause] So, a chick walks into a gynecologist's office...
• Vote for this Quote! • July 6th, 2007Glenn Quagmire [when asked to babysit Stewie]: Well, in... in accordance with Megan's Law, I'm obligated to inform you that, uh... you know what, that's fine. I'll take the kids.
• Vote for this Quote! • July 6th, 2007Glenn Quagmire: Hello, 911?, it's Quagmire. Yeah, yeah, it's in a window this time.
• Vote for this Quote! • July 5th, 2007 Glenn Quagmire: Hey honey, why don't you turn around and show me the Lower East side?
Transvestite [deep voice]: Sure.
Glenn Quagmire: WHOA! Transvestite! Back off! Wait a sec, pre-op or post-op?
Transvestite: Pre-op.
Glenn Quagmire: WHOA! Transvestite! Back off!
Glenn Quagmire [after shaving his privates]: Does this look like a "Q" to you?
• Vote for this Quote! • July 5th, 2007 Glenn Quagmire: Hey there, sweetie. How old are you?
Connie D'Amico: Sixteen.
Glenn Quagmire: Eighteen? You're first.
Connie D'Amico: Mom!
Glenn Quagmire: I like where this is going. Giggity, giggity, gig-gi-ty!
Glenn Quagmire: I felt guilty once, but she woke up about halfway through.
• Vote for this Quote! • July 5th, 2007Glenn Quagmire [to lesbians]: So, you ladies ever been penetrated?
• Vote for this Quote! • July 5th, 2007
