Richard Gilmore Quotes (Page 3)
Lorelai: That’s right, you make coffee, so you’ll need a coffee maker. Let’s see. Ugly, crappy, German, ooh - pretty!
Richard: Oh, well, as long as it’s pretty...
Richard: Oh, oh, a family man shouldn’t drive a motorcycle. The accidents I covered for the firm involving motorcycles – the worst, grisly. They use this industrial machine to scrape the victims off the road like a huge spatula.
Lorelai: Hey, mouthful of cherries here.
Richard: Lorelai, this is just beautiful! It's like something out of Architectural Digest. You should be very proud.
Lorelai: [smiling] Thanks, Dad!
Emily: Your dress needs pressing.
Richard: His head is shaped like a football.
Emily: It is not.
Richard: If he fell asleep in the park, someone would try to punt him.
Emily: [So] you were on the phone…
Richard: Long distance.
Lorelai: God?
Richard: London.
Lorelai: God lives in London?
Richard: My mother lives in London.
Lorelai: Your mother is God?
Richard: Lorelai…
Lorelai: So, God is a woman.
Richard: Lorelai…
Lorelai: And a relative! That's so cool.
Emily: Yes. So, Rory, your grandfather and I thought it might be nice after dinner for you to go around the house and pick out what you'd like us to leave you in our wills.
Richard: Take a look at that desk in my office. It's a really fine Georgian piece.
Lorelai: Why don't I ever bring a tape recorder to these dinners?
Rory: Oh, well, anything you want to leave me is fine.
Emily: Nonsense. You should have what you like. So look around and when you see something you like stick a post-it on it.
Lorelai: OK, you two have officially hit a new level of weird that even I marvel at.
Emily: You can pick out things too, you know.
Lorelai: Oh, well now it's way less creepy.
Emily: Did you hear that Richard? Apparently we're creepy.
Richard: Yes, well, live and learn.
Rory: So, Grandpa, how's the insurance biz going?
Richard: Eh, people die, we pay. People crash cars, we pay. People lose a foot, we pay.
Lorelai: Well, at least you have your new slogan.
Richard: How are things at the motel, Lorelai?
Lorelai: You mean the inn? Great.