Samantha Jones Quotes (Page 12)

The Ladies

Charlotte [drunk] : I want to do things to him that I have never done to anyone. Like the other night I was thinking about putting whipped cream all over my body.
Samantha : Low fat Kool Whip is the best. It's less sticky than other brands.

  • Vote for this Quote! • August 13th, 2007


Charlotte [After the wedding] I finally get to sleep with Trey.
Carrie : Excuse me?
Miranda : You haven't slept with him yet?
Samantha : Honey, before you buy the car you take it for a test drive!

  • Vote for this Quote! • August 13th, 2007


Samantha (on kilts) : I like the idea of men in skirts. Easy access.

  • Vote for this Quote! • August 13th, 2007


Nurse : Do you swallow?
Samantha : Only when surprised.

  • Vote for this Quote! • August 13th, 2007


Samantha : What if I have it?
Carrie : You don't have it.
Samantha : Sometimes it takes me a really long time to get over a cold.
Carrie : That's not AIDS, it's central air conditioning.

  • Vote for this Quote! • August 13th, 2007



Samantha : I'm starving! Where's the food?
Miranda : They're WASPs. There's never food, only booze.
Samantha : Fine. One martini, six olives.

  • Vote for this Quote! • August 13th, 2007


Samantha : Don't beat yourself up. Aidan hasn't said "I love you" yet. Until he does, you're a free agent.
Carrie : What is that, The Rules according to Samantha?
Samantha : See? I'm more old fashioned than you think.

  • Vote for this Quote! • August 13th, 2007


Adam : Come on, give me a little BJ, up and down a couple times, you're done, it's easy!
Samantha : Easy? You men have no idea what we're dealing with down there. Teeth placement, and jaw stress, and suction, and gag reflex, and all the while bobbing up and down, moaning and trying to breathe through our noses. Easy? Honey, they don't call it a job for nothin'!

  • Rating 5.0 / 5Vote for this Quote! • August 13th, 2007


Samantha : Maybe there's something he can eat to make it sweeter.
Carrie : Maybe you should write to Martha Stewart.
Miranda : "Dear Martha: Funky spunk. Help."

  • Vote for this Quote! • August 13th, 2007


Samantha : The guy I'm seeing has the funkiest tasting spunk.
[Charlotte abruptly leaves the restaurant]
Carrie : And she's never coming back!

  • Rating 5.0 / 5Vote for this Quote! • August 13th, 2007


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Total Quotes: 183