Stan Quotes (Page 4)
Kyle: Dude, that new kid is such a douche.
Cartman: Yeah, somebody needs to put him in his place.
Butters: He's a pecker-face, that's what he is.
Cartman: Go kick his ass, Stan!
Clyde: Yeah, go kick his ass.
Stan: (unsure) W—maybe he won't fight.
Cartman: Will he bleed? That's all we care about.
Kyle: Come on, dude, somebody needs to wipe that f**kin' smirk off his face.
Craig: Yeah, little bitch!
Stan: Alright, I'm gonna go kick his ass.
[Stan leaves to do so.]
Cartman: Yeah, go Stan! Go Stan! …alright, I've got five bucks on the other kid, who wants in?
Stan: Dude, it's Kyle's birthday, we should do whatever he wants to do.
Cartman: What? F**k Kyle!
Stan: I think old people should have rights, grandpa. I just don't want to die.
• Vote for this Quote! • September 4th, 2007 Randy: Stan, are you okay?
Stan: Yeah dad, we're just rehearsing our band.
Randy: Ohh.. I thought a group of Vietnamese people were getting their intestines pulled out through their mouths. *closes door*
Stan: You don't know anything about Christianity, Cartman!
Cartman: I know enough to exploit it.
Cartman, Stan, Kenny: We're here! We're not queer! But we're close! Get used to it!
• Vote for this Quote! • September 4th, 2007 Cartman: Look guys. A lot of the kids in school are talking and they are spreading rumors that we're not metro-sexuals because we hang out with Kyle.
Stan: Well what can we do about it?
Cartman: We have no choice guys. We're just going to have to kill Kyle.
Stan: Dude, I have no idea what we're seeing right now, but I have a feeling it's really, really wrong.
• Vote for this Quote! • September 4th, 2007 Stan: You'd better go over our story again so we don't screw it up
Cartman: Okay, last night all four of us were at the bowling alley until about 7:30 at which time we noticed Ally Sheedy the goth chick from The Breakfast Club who was bowling in the lane next to us when we asked her for her autograph but she didn't have a pen so we followed her out to her car but on the way we were accosted by five Scientologists who wanted to give us all personality tests which were administered at the Scientology Center in Denver until 10:45 at which time we accidentally boarded the wrong bus home and ended up in Ranchas des Fritas Rojes South of Castle Rock and finally got a ride home from a man who was missing his left index finger named Gary Bushwell arriving home at 11:46.
Kyle: I'm confused; did Ally Sheedy take the personality test?
Stan: Yes, dude!
Butters: Wait right here Stan, I warn you. You may not like what you see.
[Butters goes into the closet.]
Stan: We have to teach our parents a lesson. Show them they can't play with our emotions like that.
[Butters comes out of the closet, dressed as becomes Professor Chaos]
Butters: Ha ha ha ha ha. Now you know my terrible secret.
Stan: You're gay? It's fine if you're gay Butters, I don't care.
Butters: Huh? But I'm Professor Chaos!
