Stewie Griffin Quotes (Page 20)

Dysfunctional Family

Lois Griffin: Stewie! All these months I should have been paying attention to what you've been saying! You're an evil child. Why, why did I have to go and smoke pot when I was pregnant with you?!?
Stewie Griffin: Cheer up Mother, you should be proud. You've given birth to the future emperor of the world. Pity you won't be around to enjoy it. Cheerio!

  • Vote for this Quote! • July 5th, 2007


Lois Griffin: [in a dream] My God, it all makes sense now. My baby is some kind of diabolical genius bent on world domination!
Stewie Griffin: [clapping] Bravo, Lois. The last horse finally crosses the finish line.

  • Vote for this Quote! • July 5th, 2007


Lois: Oh, I haven't been on a college campus in years. Everything seems so different.
Stewie: Really? Perhaps if you laid on your back with your ankles behind your ears that would ring a few bells.

  • Vote for this Quote! • February 11th, 2007


Stewie: Damn you ice cream, come to my mouth! How dare you disobey me!

  • Rating 5.0 / 5Vote for this Quote! • February 11th, 2007


Lois: What kind of egotistical, selfish, moronic and idiotic person would get liposuction... Who? WHO?
(Peter walks in at half of his weight)
Stewie: Oh my God... It has finally happened, he has become so massive that he collapsed into himself like a neutron star.

  • Vote for this Quote! • February 11th, 2007



Stewie: HA! That's so funny I forgot to laugh... excluding that first Ha.

  • Vote for this Quote! • February 11th, 2007


Stewie: Duck, duck, (slaps Janet on the head) GOOSE!
Janet cries.
Stewie: Oh come on I barely hit you! See this is why people don't respect the WNBA!

  • Vote for this Quote! • February 11th, 2007


Stewie: You know, mother, this could almost have passed for a palatable banana pudding, but without Nilla wafers it's just another one of your wretched culinary abortions. Now clean it up!

  • Vote for this Quote! • February 11th, 2007


Stewie: Go on, hot wire it!
Brian: Hot wire? I don't even pump my own gas.

  • Vote for this Quote! • February 11th, 2007


Stewie: Oh yes, you have a lot to think about: public drunkenness, grand theft auto...
Brian: You forgot the part where I made you smash your head into the windshield.
Stewie: I don't remember-
Brian: (Slams on brakes, causing Stewie to fly forward into winshield)
Stewie: Yes, well, I suppose I walked right into that one.

  • Vote for this Quote! • February 11th, 2007


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Total Quotes: 225