Stewie Griffin Quotes (Page 22)
Stewie (reading the Bible): My, my. What a thumping good read! Lions eatting Christians, people nailing each other to two-by-fours. I say, you won't find that in Winnie the Pooh.
• Vote for this Quote! • February 10th, 2007Stewie: You know, I rather like this God fellow. Very theatrical, you know. Pestilence here, a plague there. Omnipotence ... gotta get me some of that
• Rating 5.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • February 10th, 2007Stewie: I say, Mother, this hot dog has been on my plate for a full minute and it hasn't yet cut itself.
Lois: Honey, I'll be right there.
Stewie: Oh, by all means, take your time. Oh, and when you do finally get around to it, I'll be the one covered in flies with a belly that protrudes half-way to bloody Boston!
Butler (cuts eggs): Your eggs are cut sir.
Stewie: Cut my milk!
Butler: I can't sir, it's liquid.
Stewie: Imbecile! Freeze it, then cut it, and if you question me again I'll put you on diaper detail and I promise I won't make it easy for you.
Stewie: What the hell do you think you're doing!?
Lois: Strapping you in, honey, so you don't get hurt.
Stewie: "So I don't get hurt;" that's the best you can come up with, you dull-witted termagant?
Lois: I brought your Raffi tape!
Stewie: Play "Wheels on the Bus" and get the hell out of my sight.
Lois: Stewie, say hi to our new neighbor, Officer Swanson.
Stewie: You will bow to me!
Stewie: Machiavelli! You've told me nothing I don’t already know! Ah Sun Zhu's The Art of War.
Lois: Stewie, those books aren’t for babies. Here. Watch the Teletubbies.
Stewie: How dare you! That book may hold the key to my enslaving of all mankind
Stewie: For the love of God, shake me! Shake me like a British nanny!
• Rating 5.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • February 10th, 2007Stewie: I say, am I to spend the entire day wallowing around in my own feces? A little service here.
Peter: Hey stinky. Have we got big plans for you.
Stewie: Plans? What the devil are you talking about?
Stewie: What do you want?
Man in White: I want to get the hell out of here!
Stewie: Oh, I'm sorry, We're fresh out of that, but what I can give you is UNTIMELY DEATH!