Susan Mayer Quotes (Page 4)
Susan: "I don’t deserve friends like you."
Lynette: "We’re aware of that."
Susan: "You're always worried about Julie and me and you beat up my new boyfriend. And now you're protecting me from Edie. Do you know what all that means?"
Mike: "That you're high maintenance?"
Susan: "Oh! Darn it. Guess we'll have to take a rain check, huh?"
Gus: "I can come back on Tuesday."
Susan: "Tuesday? No, no, Tuesday's not good, 'cause Tuesday's the day I, um... become a lesbian!"
Lynette: "Karl broke up with Edie."
Susan: "Oh my god!"
Bree: "Yeah, apparently he was seeing someone."
Susan: "Really? Did he say who is was?"
Edie: "I know who she is. She’s a man-eating, scum-sucking ho bag!"
Bree: "No, he did not say."
Susan: "I was married to Karl, and I used to try to surprise him, and he would always, always, always say 'No, Susan. Don't surprise me. I don't like it.'"
Edie: "Whatever. I'm doing it, so keep your trap shut. Now if you'll excuse me, I've gotta go and buy a wedding dress. Oh, and by the way, I'll be wearing white, so that'll be a surprise for everybody."
Susan: "I need you to ditch Edie tomorrow night and have dinner with Dr. Ron and me."
Karl: "Now why would I do that?"
Susan: "Well, for starters, because you banged your secretary and you owe me for the rest of your life."
Karl: "I'll bring wine."
Susan: "So, I guess we have the whole insurance thing worked out."
Nurse Hisel: "Oh! Don't worry about that. Please. Who am I to cast stones? I mean, heck, I didn't pass my nurse's exam. They didn't even ask me!"
Edie: "Get in here. I have some news that's probably gonna devastate you. But I wanted to be the first one to tell you."
Susan: "Okay."
Edie: "Karl is about to pop the question."
Susan: "You mean, like, marriage?"
Edie: "Mmm hmm! Oh, I hope I haven't ruined your Valentine's Day. Do you want a tissue?"
Julie: "Look, I'm not too crazy about this whole fake marriage thing, but if you don't have that operation, you could die. So don't be so hard on yourself. You are a good person."
Susan: "Thanks, hon. That really helps. Okay, now I want you to go over and slip this ring to your father. And just so you know, if Edie catches you, I'm expecting you to swallow it."
Julie: "I know no one's asking me, but I think this whole thing is a tragic mistake and I just don't have it in me to survive another ugly divorce."
Susan: "Don't worry, honey. This time, it is strictly a business arrangement."
Julie: "It better be, 'cause if I see so much as one lingering gaze between the two of you, I swear I'll go to the insurance company and turn you in."
Susan: "So, we shouldn't expect a wedding gift, huh?"
