Ted Buckland Quotes
Turk: Look Jen, if you need any legal help concerning your accident, you can talk to Jim who is a very successful, bulldog of a lawyer, or you can talk to Ted, who, well-
Ted: My Mom calls me Thunder.
Jen: I'm going to go with the less shiny one.
Jim: Tough break there, Thunder.
Ted: YOU'RE NOT MY MOM JIM!!! YOU'RE NOT MY MOM!!!
Ted: [About Heather] I'd let her give me a bath. I don't care if my mom was watching.
• Rating 3.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • July 9th, 2007 Ted: Did you hear the lottery's up to $100,000,000? If I win, it's going to be separate beds for me and my mom!
Carla: And you could spend the other $99,999,000 on therapy.
Ted: You wanna quit? Then quit! But you sir are a Worthless Peon! And you will always will be a Worthless Peon! [hangs up the phone, turns to Dr. Kelso] Sir, you know my band? The Worthless Peons. Well, Chris from shipping and receiving wants to go solo. We lose him, we lose our sex appeal. He's the only one with hair. What do you think I should do?
Kelso: Ted you know my rule about personal problems. I'm not interested unless it involves my loved ones. Or possibly my wife.
J.D.: A patient's blaming me for losing his sense of smell.
Ted: Oh my God, you cut off someone's nose?! Where is it? Do you have it on you? You're disgusting.
Ted: Unfortunately, you've, uh, put us in somewhat of a legal bind.
Kelso: Way to go, Ted. My God, man, you couldn't scare a child.
Ted: Who... who would want to?
Ted: Finally, doctors, if there is a mistake, don't admit it to the patient. Of course, if the patient is deceased - and you're sure - you can feel free to tell him or her... anything.
• Vote for this Quote! • April 5th, 2007
