Tobias Fünke Quotes (Page 6)
Jessie: And Tobias, you're a medical doctor and you're living an absurd fantasy as an actor. It's time to get real.
Tobias: Wow. It's a tough talk, but I like it. You're saying "land a major film."
Tobias: Take me to the Gothic Castle.
Cab Driver: Gothic Arsehole, right mate.
Tobias: Do you have anything that says 'Dad Likes Leather'?
Leather Shop Assistant: Something that says "Leather daddy" ?
Tobias: Oh, is there such a thing?
Tobias: Okay, kids. Mommy and Daddy are going out for ice cream.
Maeby: Can we come?
Lindsay: Sorry, it's not for kids.
Tobias: Okay everybody. Well we've lost the leading lady. But did you know that in Shakespeare's day, the women's roles were played by men? Fancy that. George-Michael, you know Steven's lines, yes?
George-Michael: Sort of.
Tobias: Fine, then you are my Benedict. And Steven Holt, where is Steven Holt?
Steve Holt: Steve Holt!
Tobias: What an adventure gang! I thought that the homosexuals were pirates. But it turns out that most of them were actors in the local theater. You're right though, it is amazing: I've been waiting for the universe to provide a path for me and I think it has.
Lindsay: You're gay?
Tobias: No. No, I'm not gay. Lindsay, how many times must we have this... No. I want to be... an actor.
Michael: Maybe you'll be inspired by the boat party tonight and start a career as a pirate.
Tobias: I haven't packed for that.
