Gabrielle: "Hi, uh, I need a paternity test."
Receptionist: "Well, we'll just schedule you for an exam."
Gabrielle: "Oh, no, no. I don't need to take a test. I am just trying to reassure my husband of what I know is true in my heart. So if you could just slip me someone else's test results, I could make my own. I got Photoshop for Christmas. Oh, come on. You look like a fun-loving girl. I am sure you've been in a couple hairy situations of your own."
Receptionist: "Just because I choose to express myself doesn't mean that I condone adultery. Sorry."
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Show: Desperate Housewives
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Character: Gabrielle Solis
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