Quotes (Page 5)
Dwight: Second Life is not a game. It is a multi-user, virtual environment. It doesn't have points or scores. It doesn't have winners or losers.
Jim: Oh, it has losers.
Michael: Phyllis is like our Mrs. Butterworth. Kind of a less urban Aunt Jemima.
• Rating 5.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • October, 30th 2007Andy Bernard: Break me off a piece of that... Grey Poupon!
• Rating 5.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • October, 30th 2007Andy: [trying to remember Kit Kat theme] Break me off a piece of that... Chrysler car? Football cream?
• Rating 5.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • October, 30th 2007Jim: I think it's great that the company's making a commercial. Because not very many people have heard of us. I mean, when I tell people that I work at Dunder Mifflin, they think that we sell mufflers. Or muffins. Or mittens. And frankly, all of those sound better than paper, so I let it slide.
• Rating 5.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • October, 30th 2007 Jim: Did I ever tell you why I left Scranton?
Dwight: [cries quietly]
Jim: Yeah, I didn't think I had. Well, it was all about Pam. Yeah, I mean, she was with Roy... and I just couldn't take it. I mean, I lost it, Dwight. I couldn't sleep, I couldn't concentrate on anything. And then weird stuff, like, food had no taste. So my solution was to move away. It was awful. And it's something that I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. And that includes you.
Michael: Hey, hey, hey!
Oscar: Michael, are you having money problems?
Michael: Monkey problem? No, I'm not having monkey problems. Why would I have monkey problems?
Oscar: You heard me correctly.
Michael: I hate monkeys.
Pam: What's going on, why do you have a second job?
Michael: I don't have a second job. Maybe I'm having an affair with Suzanne Sommers.
Pam: Doesn't Jan have money?
Michael: I don't talk to my girlfriend about money. It is rude and unsexual.
Kevin: True, it's best to hide our money problems from women.
Michael: I totally agree with you. But I don't have money problems, I don't. Alright, you know what? Watch this, if I had money problems, would I do this? [Michael takes out a dollar bill, crumples it up and puts it back in his pocket]
Stanley: You just put it back in your pocket.
Michael: Yeah, but I destroyed it. It's not even useable anymore.
Dwight: My girlfriend and I broke up recently. And I must say, I am relieved. Gives me a chance to sow my wild oats. In the Schrute family, we have a tradition, where when the male has sex with another woman, he is rewarded with a bag of wild oats left on his door step by his parents. You can use these oats to make oatmeal, bread, whatever you want. I don't care - they're your oats.
• Rating 5.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • October, 30th 2007 Ryan: What I really want, honestly, Michael, is for you to know it so you can communicate it to the people here, to your clients, to whomever.
Michael: Oh okay...
Ryan: What?
Michael: It's whoever, not whomever.
Ryan: No, it's whomever.
Michael: No, whomever is never actually right.
Jim: Well, sometimes it's right.
Creed: Michael is right. It's a made-up word used to trick students.
Andy: No. Actually, whomever is the formal version of the word.
Oscar: Obviously it's a real word, but I don't know when to use it correctly.
Michael: Not a native speaker.
Michael: I just love sales. I love it to death. It's as simple as that. And I don't get to do it enough as a manager, so I took this second job. I count it as a hobby. Some people have golf, or relaxing.
• Vote for this Quote! • October, 30th 2007
