And the Wiener Is... Quotes
Peter Griffin: Every guy you see with a big house or a fancy car or a shiny gold tooth is really just saying "Don't look at my penis." But you'll never have to worry about that.
Chris Griffin: Thanks, Dad! You're the best! You know, Dad, I just realized something. Your name's Peter.
Peter Griffin: Yeah. You're right, it is. Hehehehe. Peter.
Glenn Quagmire: Hey there, sweetie. How old are you?
Connie D'Amico: Sixteen.
Glenn Quagmire: Eighteen? You're first.
Connie D'Amico: Mom!
Glenn Quagmire: I like where this is going. Giggity, giggity, gig-gi-ty!
NGA Spokesman: So remember... guns don't kill people. Dangerous minorities do.
• Rating 5.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • July 5th, 2007Petey the Pistol: If you squeeze me, I make bad people go away!
• Rating 5.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • July 5th, 2007 Lois Griffin: See, Meg, I'm like one of those bald eagles you see on the Discovery Channel. Beautiful to look at, but mess with one of my chicks and I'll use my razor-sharp talons to rip your [oven bell rings] ...ing eyes out! Cookies are done! Who wants chocolate chip?
Stewie Griffin: Mmm, I do! But... but keep talking. All this stuff about eye-gouging has got me all frisky. Really, I've got about a half a pack of Rolaids in my diaper.
Chris Griffin: Is Dad mad at me?
Lois Griffin: Oh, of course not, honey. Now, go pick out a box of cereal and meet me at the "10 inches or less" line. I mean items!
Brian Griffin: Look, Peter, you're overreacting to this Chris stuff. I mean... mean, mine goes inside of me when I stand up; how do you think I feel?
• Vote for this Quote! • July 5th, 2007Stewie Griffin: She packed my bags...last night, preflight. Zero hour, 9 am. [takes a hit] And I'm gonna be... high... as a kite by then. And I think it's gonna be a long, long time, 'till touchdown brings me 'round again to find: I'm not the man...they think I am at home. Oh, no, no no. I'm a rocket man. Rocket man, burning out his fuse out here, alone...And I think it's gonna be a long, long time, 'till touchdown brings me 'round again to find: I'm not the man they think I am at home. Oh, no, no, no. I'm a rock-it man. Rocket man, burning out his fuse out here, alone.
• Vote for this Quote! • July 5th, 2007Stewie Griffin: Come talk to me sweethart. I know what it takes to be cool.
• Vote for this Quote! • July 5th, 2007 Lois Griffin [sees Chris' penis]: Oh, my! Well, no wonder he's always slouching.
Peter Griffin: How the hell did this happen? I'm supposed to be the man of the house. You must be so ashamed of me.
Lois Griffin: Oh, Peter, I care as much about the size of your penis as you care about the size of my breasts.
Peter Griffin: OH, MY GOD!
