Brian the Bachelor Quotes
Joe Swanson: DO YOU KNOW WHAT A CAVITY SEARCH IS?!
• Vote for this Quote! • July 10th, 2007 Mrs. Quagmire: Glenn, would you feed Mittens?
Glenn Quagmire: Mittens has food in his bowl!
Mrs. Quagmire: That's old food! [Mittens meows]
Glenn Quagmire: Mittens, shut up! Mittens, SHUT UP!
Mrs. Quagmire: Don't you talk to Mittens that way! Mittens is a member of this family!
Glenn Quagmire: Mom, you want this three-way to happen, you're gonna have to change your tone!
Chris Griffin: No, Doug, I will not lift up her shirt!
Lois Griffin: Chris, we have company!
Peter Griffin: So, you , uh...you ever been with a woman?
Brooke Roberts: Um...no.
Lois Griffin: Peter!
Peter Griffin: What?
Stewie Griffin: [voice pitch increases with every sentence] How you, uh, how you coming on that novel... you working on, huh? Got a big, uh, big stack of papers there? Got a, got a, got a nice little, nice little story you're working on there...your big novel you’ve been working on for three years. Huh? Got a, got a compelling protagonist, huh? Got an obstacle for him to overcome, huh? Little story brewing there... working on... working on that for quite some time, huh? Yeah, talking about that three years ago, huh? Been working on that the whole time? Nice little, uh, narrative--beginning, middle, and end? Some friends become enemies, some enemies become friends? Yeah? At the end your, uh, main character is, uh, richer for the experience? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? You got a-- [voice returns to mormal] no, no, you deserve some time off.
• Vote for this Quote! • July 10th, 2007 Cleveland Brown: Peter, I can't do this! I'm too nervous. I got to go.
Peter Griffin: No, no, Cleveland, I'm not gonna let you do this. [takes off Cleveland's belt] I'll tie you down, if I have to.
Cleveland Brown: Peter, this is only making it worse! Oh, God, my claustrophobia is setting in.
Peter Griffin: It's alright, it's alright. It's okay. It's the fabric. It's the fabric. It's your clothes. Let's-let's get your clothes off. [takes off Cleveland's clothes]
Cleveland Brown: Peter? Peter, what's wrong with you? I'm naked!
Peter Griffin: Oh, god, you're self-conscious. I'm sorry. Here, you know what? [takes his own clothes off] Look, look, Cleveland, look. See, see? Now you're not alone. You're not alone, Cleveland.
Female producer: 200 auditions and nothing.
Male producer: Well, we still got one guy waiting.
Female producer: You lined up 201 auditions? What a weird number.
Male producer: You're weird!
Stewie Griffin: Well, I guess the pilot must have been JFK Jr. Ugh, even I found that to be in bad taste.
• Rating 5.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • July 10th, 2007
