Family Guy Quotes (Page 75)
Chris: Hey, dad, look! I covered my back with honey and now the ants are taking me home.
Peter: He does the same thing at home with Velveeta and c**kroaches. If you turn the light on really fast they slam him right into the fridge.
Cleveland: He's tasting victory. I bet it tastes good, like salt-water taffy or a Chunky.
• Vote for this Quote! • February 11th, 2007Peter: The lesson here is that abusing alcohol has absolutely no negative consequences. You have your trophy and my brain cells are just fine.
• Vote for this Quote! • February 11th, 2007Peter: Lois, everyone has their sanctuary. The Catholics have churches, fat people have Wisconsin, and I have the Pawtucket Brewery.
• Vote for this Quote! • February 11th, 2007Lois: Have you been drinking?
Peter: Why, yes, I have. Thank you.
Peter: Beer that never goes flat. Do you know what that means, Brian? This beer will still be carbonated long after you die of old age and we buy another dog to help the kids ... y'know, forget about you.
• Vote for this Quote! • February 11th, 2007Mafia guy: You come to me and ask me to kill a man I do not know. Now I ask you, why should I kill this "Count Chocula"?
Captain Crunch: Because that son of a bitch has been spreading lies! My cereal does not cut the roof of your mouth! With all respect.
Lois: Oh, my God! You can only play the piano when you're drunk!
Peter: Now that's not true! I can also vomit, fall down and make dirty calls to your sister when I'm drunk!
Lois: You're drunk again.
Peter: No, I'm just exhausted 'cause I've been up all night drinking.
Lois: My days in college were so exciting. This one time, the national guard came and shot some of my friends.
• Vote for this Quote! • February 11th, 2007
