My Name Is Earl Quotes (Page 4)
Randy: [discovering a laptop] Hey look, a porn machine!
• Vote for this Quote! • July 31st, 2007 Philo: [after Earl tries to persuade Catalina to make out with him to cheer him up] No, it's okay, there's already a girl I'm in love with. She's hot.
Catalina: I'm hot.
Philo: You're okay, but compared to her, you're like those things in Lord Of The Rings that grow out of the ground covered in slime and attack the castle.
Randy: Ewoks. Those are called Ewoks.
Ralph: What if I cut off my pinky toe, put it in this 'ere cooler, stick it in a Winky Dinky dog and sue them for ten thousand dollars?
Earl: You are not cutting off your pinky toe, we're going to have to think of another way to come up with the money.
Ralph: Well, you see, the think about that is...
Earl: Your pinky toe's already in the cooler, isn't it?
Raplh: Yeah, it's in there.
Randy: You takin' Pops' hot dogs outta Camden County is like taking chicken out of Syracuse.
Earl: It's Buffalo, Randy.
Randy: No, I'm pretty sure it's chicken, Earl.
Joy: Yeah, it's chicken! Hot chicken!
Ralph: This is what I do for a living, all right? I got this whole thing worked out on a level you wouldn’t even begin to understand, baby. This whole thing’s a chess game and this here machine is the pope.
• Vote for this Quote! • July 31st, 2007Earl: We should have taken back roads, but how often do you get to surf a giant hot dog down main street?
• Vote for this Quote! • July 31st, 2007 Mr. Patrick: Are you and E-coli buddies?
Earl: Is that the little Chinese guy in the back who washes the dishes?
Earl: Shh, I'm not telling Randy, he's afraid of chickens... and the Pope's big hat, but mainly because he thinks there's a chicken under it.
• Vote for this Quote! • July 27th, 2007 Earl: It's gone!
Dodge: What's gone?
Earl: Mystery Fun Land. They tore it down. Now I can't cross ya off the list.
Dodge: You mean your "idiot list"?
Earl: Is that what your mom calls it?
Dodge: She also puts another word in front of it, but I don't know what it means. The guy from Scarface says it a lot.
Earl Jr.: I know what it means.
Joy: You don't want to injure your toilet-scrubbing hand.
Catalina: Quiero agracader a toda el publico Latino que nos acompaña cada semana. Y para los que no son Latinos, les felicito por aprender otro idioma. (I want to thank all the Latino audience that joins us every week. And for those that are not Latino, congratulations to them for learning another language.)
Joy: Sorry sweetheart, I don't speak maid.
