Scrubs Quotes (Page 2)
Intern: Dr. Cox!
Dr. Kelso: You might want to knock, he's in an imaginary glass bubble.
Dr. Cox: Okay, I made you breakfast, the kitchen's as clean as a whistle, I'm gonna drop Jack off at daycare on the way to work, is there anything else I can do for you?
Jordan: I need you to go to the video store and get me anything with Viggo Somethingsen. I need white chocolate, strawberry seltzer, peppercorn brie and a polaroid of the tomato plant that I planted last spring, because I'm worried it may have snails. Oh, and if you see that neighbor Lena from down the hall I want you to roll your eyes and say the word "slut", under your breath, but loud enough so she can hear, and don't forget to be home by 6:30 because you gotta give Jack his bath before you make my dinner!
Dr. Cox: But, when will I have time to kill myself?
Jordan: Well thats not my problem!
Dr. Cox: Move!
Carla: What's up your butt?
Laverne: Yeah, what is all up in there?
Dr. Cox: Why don't you hop aboard the "What's Up Dr. Cox's Butt Trolly" and we can begin our tour, coming up on the left is my bloated, bed ridden ex-wife that's not allowed to lift a finger, which, thankfully leaves it all up to these guys [Dr. Cox shows his hands]. Now, if you'll look to your right, you'll see my waning libido, my crushed soul and my very last nerve, which I would advise you not to get on, under or even close to.
Laverne: Does it help to know that Jesus loves you?
Dr. Cox: [Nodding] It does not.
Laverne: Well, everything happens for a reason.
Dr. Cox: Are you really trying to tell me that things like, New Orleans, AIDS, sugar free ice cream, crack babies, Hugh Jackman, and cancer all happen for a reason? Because I'm sorry, I'm-I'm just not buying that.
Laverne: "God works all things for good" - Romans 8:28.
Dr. Cox: "Bull Honky" - Perry Cox. 6'1. Buck eighty-five after lunch. [Winks]
Ted: [About Heather] I'd let her give me a bath. I don't care if my mom was watching.
• Rating 3.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • July 9th, 2007 Mrs. Miller: [to J.D.] Shut your cakehole Mary-Beth, or I swear to God I'll shut it soon!
Dr. Cox: Congratulations, we'll schedule your test this afternoon. [walks off, impressed]
J.D.: [voiceover] In musicals, there's always a happy ending, but, in life, sometimes when you get what you want, you end up missing what you left behind. Whether it's your roommate [camera pans Elliot's new house], or time spent with your child [shot of Carla leaving her child with a nanny], or even the music you used to hear, in your head. [Patti hums the last notes of "Welcome to Sacred Heart"]
• Rating 5.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • July 7th, 2007 J.D.: You're the only man who's ever been inside of me!
Turk: Whoa, I just took out his appendix!
Whole cast: Sometimes you're better off not knowing, but this isn't one of those times. Your world's become a musical, and your doctors speak in rhymes!
• Rating 5.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • July 7th, 2007Dr. Cox: I mega-loathe you all.
• Rating 5.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • July 7th, 2007 J.D.: [voiceover] The only thing worse than not knowing why a patient is crashing, is being offered help by the hospital's grief counselor, Dr. Hedrick.
Dr. Hedrick: Need help, old friend?
J.D.: Oh yeah, her kidneys are failing, give her a pep talk, stat.
