Seinfeld Quotes (Page 4)
Kramer: Hey, Jerry! Come in here a sec! Hey!
Jerry: Oh my God!
Kramer: It's the Merv Griffin set!
Jerry: How did you get this in here?
Kramer: Oh, you just bring it in sideways and hook it.
Jerry: So where are you gonna sleep?
Kramer: Yeah... backstage.
George:: Why couldn't you squeeze one of those stupid rubber balls to get your stress out? Why did you have to destroy 25 computers?
Kramer: George, you listen to me. I owe ya one.
Frank: Hey, Braun, Costanza's kicking your butt!
George: [using the phone] Watch how it's done. Oh, hello, Mr. Vandalay? Would you like to buy a computer? Oh, really? Two dozen?
George:: You've got shiksappeal. Jewish men love the idea of meeting a woman that's not like their mother.
• Vote for this Quote! • July 4th, 2007 Kramer: Simple. You let out one emotion, all the rest will come with it. It's like Endora's box.
Jerry: That was the mother on Bewitched. You mean Pandora.
Kramer: Yeah, well, she... had one, too.
Elaine: Whoa. What is the matter?
Jerry: It's Patty.
Elaine: Jerry, you break up with a girl every week.
Jerry: [cries] What... what is this salty discharge?
Elaine: Oh my God. You're crying.
Jerry: This is horrible! I care!
Frank: You're late again, Costanza, so listen up. Starting tonight, we're having a little sales contest. The loser gets fired, the winner gets a Waterpik.
Estelle: [from the other room] You're not giving away our Waterpik!
Frank: Serenity now!
Jerry: Hello? Yeah, this is Jerry Seinfeld. No, no, no, I do not want to stop over in Cincinnati. Well, then you upgrade me. That's right, you should thank me. Goodbye. [hangs up] Hey, I'm flyin' first class!
Elaine: Where did that come from?
Jerry: Patty showed me how to get mad. You gotta problem with that?
Elaine: No.
Jerry: Good.
Jerry: Kramer, I am so sick of you comin' in here and eatin' all my food. Now shut that door and get the hell out of here!
Kramer: [laughs] What is that, a new bit?
George: All right, Dad, we're five blocks from the house. Sit sideways.
Frank: Like an animal. Because of her, I have to sit here like an animal! Serenity now! Serenity now!
George: What is that?
Frank: Doctor gave me a relaxation cassette. When my blood pressure gets too high, the man on the tape tells me to say, 'Serenity now!'
George: Are you supposed to yell it?
Frank: The man on the tape wasn't specific.
