The Merger Quotes
Michael: Sometimes what brings the kids together is hating the lunch lady. Although that'll change. Because, by the end of the fourth grade, the lunch lady was actually the person I hung out with the most.
• Vote for this Quote! • June 28th, 2007 Kelly: Jim!!! Oh my god, I have so much to tell you. Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes had a baby, and they named it Suri! And Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie also had a baby, and they named is Shiloh! And both babies are amaaaaaaaazing!
Jim: Wow, so, uh, what's new with you?
Kelly: [blank stare] I just told you.
Michael: This is an orientation, not a bore-ientation.
• Vote for this Quote! • June 28th, 2007 Dwight: Hello. I don't believe we've been introduced. Dwight Schrute, Assistant Regional Manager.
Andy: Andy Bernard, Regional Director in charge of sales.
Dwight: So you'll be reporting to me then.
Andy: On the contrary.
Dwight: My title has "manager" in it.
Andy: And I'm a director. Which on a film set, is the highest title there is. Do you know anything about film?
Dwight: I know everything about film. I've seen over 240 of them.
Andy: Congratulations.
Michael: [To Martin Nash, who is black] Follow me, I will show you where all the slaves work. Uh, not so...
• Vote for this Quote! • June 28th, 2007Dwight: The Japanese camp guards of World War Two always chose one man to kill whenever a batch of new prisoners arrived. I always wondered how they chose the man who was to die. I think I would have been good at choosing the person.
• Vote for this Quote! • June 28th, 2007Michael: My branch is absorbing the Stamford branch. Or as I like to put it, my family is doubling in size.
• Vote for this Quote! • June 28th, 2007 Dwight: What was your mile time?
Toby: About seven.
Dwight: I could beat that on a skateboard.
Toby: Well, that has wheels.
Dwight: Yeah, well, my feet don't. And I could still crush that time.
